A Life So Changed
by Thunder-Nari
Summary: Remy/Kurt Kurt is raped and Remy helps him heal.....Look!! IT'S ALIVE!!!!...Remy and Kurt head back to the mansion but what will the X-Men think of the revelations that follow??
1. Default Chapter

Ooooh look Kurt/Remy, mmmmmmmmmmm. Heh. This fic has been haunting me, I swear. It wouldn't leave me alone so I decided I better just write it. Now just to warn you (again) Kurt does get raped in this, so if you don't like it then go 'way! But don't worry it's not, like, graphic. You have been warned so no complaining about it if you decide to read. Ookay? Okay! So, anyway, please do enjoy and don't forget to review:D:P

Disclaimer:  I do not own X-Men in any way shape or form..I make no money (in anything) and am only paid in feedback(yay!). Marvel and WB owns them, not I!

A Life so Changed                                                                                                                                                    Chapter One 

He was back there again, back to a place he used to think of as home.  After this it would never be the same for him.  He paused for a moment to catch his breath and chanced a quick look back over his shoulder.  His yellow eyes practically glowed, granting him perfect sight even in the darkness.  His eyes were the only thing that could be seen, the dark blue fur that covered his body allowed him to be all but invisible in the inky blackness.  His tail lashed back and forth in agitation and there was a flash of fangs as he panted heavily from his mouth. 

He could hear the sound of baying dogs coming closer, the sounds of footfalls and human cries not far behind.  He knew that it would be easy for him to escape his pursuers.  His mutant powers that he was gifted - or was it cursed? - with at birth were not limited to his bizarre looks.  He could simply teleport away to safety.  An earlier glancing blow to the head, however, combined with the continued chase had left him shaken and unable to concentrate enough to bring his power of teleportation into play.  He had no choice but to continue running, heading towards his home where he hoped he would be safe. 

He could hear the shouts getting closer now.  Cries of Demon and Freak echoed clearly across the night sky.  He had to get moving again or they would be on him.  Staggering to his feet, he pushed himself onward, stumbling along as best he could.  He could not let them catch him again; he knew that he would be dead, or as good as, if they did.  He turned his head again to see a veritable mob of people cresting the hill he had just come over.  They carried anything from sticks to guns; a couple of people had hounds straining at the ends of their leashes. 

He could not go on much farther; he could barely keep his legs moving.  He stumbled and fell to his knees, the impact wrenching a cry of pain and surprise from his lips.  The shouting increased as the mob heard his cry and headed toward the noise. 

His mind was in a panic.  He couldn't find the strength or courage to get back up and run.  He was terrified, frozen in place, and he didn't know what to do.  They were coming for him and there was nothing he could do.  They would get him, kill him, or maybe torture him first and he would shame his entire family with what he truly was.  He didn't want to die yet though.  He wasn't ready, he was too young, had just barely begun to really live!  He tried to breathe, tried to calm his panic and focus.  The voices were practically on him now, screaming for his blood.  His powers were failing him; he felt like he couldn't breathe and his vision began to gray at the edges.  He could see a gun being pointed point blank at his face and drew on all his failing strength to will his power into action.  There was a muffled BAMF and the smell of brimstone and sulfur as his powers finally kicked in for one final teleport to safety. 

# 

Kurt jerked awake, his mouth open in a silent scream.  Glancing around widely, he took in the quilt covering him, the scatter of clothes on a carpeted floor, the empty bed across from his.  His thundering heartbeat slowed to a slightly saner pace as he got his breathing back under control.  He dropped his head into his hands, moaning softly to himself.  He had been back there again, back to the place he had thought of as his home, back in Germany.  The worst thing about this dream was that is was not a dream but a memory.  The day when the people that he had thought were his friends discovered what he truly was and despised and feared him for it.  People wondered why he didn't want to show his true form here, maybe it was because the last time he had allowed his friends to see him they had turned on him.  Why should the people here be any different?  It had been shortly after that attack that he had come to live at the Xavier Institute.  In the time that he had been here it had become his home and family. 

Even here, though, his memories haunted him.  Nightmares were a common occurrence for him.  It was harder now that Evan was gone and he was alone.  There was no other person in the room, no one to protect him and anyone could get him.  He shook his head trying to rid himself of those thoughts.  He knew it was foolish, that this was probably the safest place in the world for mutants.  That still didn't stop the fear from creeping up on him. 

He got shakily from his bed, throwing the covers back.  Shuffling over to the closet, he quickly tugged on a pair of jeans and an old ratty t-shirt.  Trudging towards the kitchen, he figured a midnight snack sounded pretty good.  He was careful not to make much noise as he grabbed some food from the fridge to make a quick sandwich.  He decided to make a roast beef sandwich with the remains of that night's dinner.  Also grabbing a nice tall glass of milk, he sat at the table and began munching his meal.  Finishing it a few minutes later he realized that he still wasn't in the mood to go back to sleep.  The fear of facing his nightmares again kept him awake.  Sitting at the table, lost in thought, he did not notice when Scott walked into the kitchen behind him. 

Scott jumped slightly when he noticed Kurt sitting at the table, chin propped up in his hands, staring into space.  He became worried when Kurt did not notice him or acknowledge his presence.  Scott walked around to sit beside Kurt and noticed the damp fur where tears had fallen.  He reached a hand out to rest on Kurt's shoulder, trying to rouse him from his thoughts.

"NO!!!  GET AWAY FROM ME!!"  Kurt's reaction was lightning quick and he lashed out at Scott with one arm, connecting with Scott's chest and knocking him to the floor.  Kurt shot to his feet, knocking his chair over and backing against the wall before sinking to the floor and curling into a ball.  Scott looked at Kurt, shock and worry written clearly on his face.  He had never seen Kurt so lost and scared, he was used to seeing the joker when he looked at Kurt.  He crawled carefully over to Kurt and spoke gently to him.

"Kurt?  It's okay, it's just me Scott.  You're okay, you're at the mansion.  No one is going to hurt you here.  It's okay."  Scott continued to murmur to Kurt and was relieved to see recognition in Kurt's eyes after a moment.  He glanced up at Scott and wiped his tears away with the heel of his hand.

"Scott?"

"Yeah, Kurt, it's me.  It's gonna be okay."  Scott hesitantly reached out to Kurt's shoulder again and began rubbing comforting circles.  He smiled, relieved when it was accepted.  That smile faded, however, when Kurt brushed his hand off and abruptly stood.  He turned away from Scott and walked towards the kitchen door, back towards his room.  Scott stood and quickly followed him.  "Kurt, wait.  If you want to talk…"

"Nein!  I do not want to talk!"  Kurt turned back to Scott, anger now written on his face.  Scott looked at him in surprise; he didn't understand what was going on, why Kurt was suddenly angry.  Kurt shook his head at Scott's confusion and continued on to his room. 

"But I don't understand," Scott called from behind him.  Kurt turned back to him as he reached his door.  His yellow eyes glowed menacingly in the dark.

"Exactly.  You do not understand because you can't."

"But if you talk to us maybe we could help.  Just tell me what's bothering you."

"There's nothing to talk about, Scott, just let it drop."  Kurt opened the door and walked into his room, making sure to lock it.  He did not want to bring his problems into the light, did not want to admit that they existed.  Hopefully by tomorrow Scott would have forgotten or decided to ignore tonight's episode and Kurt could go back to being the joker, the one with no problems.  He slipped back beneath the heavy blankets of his bed and tried to get back to sleep, praying that the nightmares wouldn't come back to haunt him again that night.

# 

Kurt woke the next morning to the sun blazing through the window and hitting him right in the eyes.  He groaned loudly and rolled over, shoving his head underneath the pillow.  His thoughts tried to travel back to last night but he pushed them away and struggled to get out of the blankets that seemed to want to keep him in bed.  He wanted nothing more than to wrap himself back in them and forget about the world.  As much as he wished that Scott would just leave him alone, Kurt knew that he would not and that he probably told the Professor as well.  Going downstairs would mean facing them and Kurt paused at his door. 

He did not want to hear them tell him that everything would be alright, that they understood.  They didn't understand; they couldn't.  They all looked normal, didn't have to hide what they really were from the world.  Even Hank, though he looked just as strange as Kurt did, would not understand because he had not had to live his entire life like that.  Had never been threatened or beaten by friends because he looked like a freak. 

He did not want everyone to pity him, he just wanted to be normal and forget about the past.  If everyone found out about his nightmares, they would drag it all out into the open and he would no longer be able to hide from it.  He was happy with the way things were now.  He had friends, he was an ordinary teenage boy, he had a home but there was always that underlying fear that it would all be taken away from him in an instant. 

So he never truly let anyone in, never let them see what he really was.  He continued to be the funny one, the one who enjoyed life because his was perfect.  Sure, there were times when he slipped but that could be easily covered by a joke at the right time, making everyone forget everything but his smiling face.  But what he really wanted, underneath it all, was for someone to just hold him during the nightmares; to be able to look into someone's eyes and see nothing but understanding and love, not pity or disgust. 

He shook his head and forced himself to stop brooding.  He couldn't keep stalling; he had to go down and face whatever Scott had to say.  He pushed the dark thoughts back again and opening the door, stepped out into the hallway. 

"Whoa!  Kurt, look out!"  Kurt turned his head to see Kitty heading straight for him at a run.  He knew that she wouldn't bother stopping and braced himself for her to run right through him.  He opened his eyes when he realized that Kitty had stopped and was now looking at him with a smile on her face.  He smiled back at her.  "Hey, I was just coming to get you.  You're gonna be late for school if you don't hurry."  Having said all she needed she continued on her run down the hall.  Kurt sighed and shook his head.  Maybe if he waited long enough Scott would go to school and leave him alone.  He walked unhurriedly towards the bathroom and was shocked to find it empty.  Grinning he jumped in before anyone else could claim it.  Only a minute later there was a banging on the door.

"Kurt."  It was Scott.  "We're going to be leaving a few minutes, you want a ride?"  Kurt could still hear the concern in Scott's voice.

"Nein, it's okay, I'll 'port over when I'm done."

"Are you sure?  We can wait."  Scott sounded a little unsure, like he wanted to say something more but didn't know if he should. 

"Its fine, Scott, you guys go."

"If you're sure."

"I'm sure, Scott, go," Kurt said with amusement.  He heard Scott walk away a moment later and began to feel somewhat bad.  Scott obviously wanted nothing more than to help and being honest Kurt had to admit, at least to himself, that it was nice to have someone who cared enough to worry about him.  Maybe he would talk with Scott later.  School came first however and he quickly prepared for yet another day. 

# 

Two teleports took him a block away from the school where he could easily walk the rest of the way.  It would be too great of a risk to teleport right up to the school where anyone could see him.  He checked his watch to be sure that he wouldn't be late and sighed when he saw a normal looking hand that felt anything but.  The watch may have hid his looks but it did nothing to get rid of the fur and he was always cautious of people touching him. 

He ran for school and managed to make it with a few minutes to spare.  Having had no time for breakfast he headed instantly over to the vending machines and got himself a chocolate bar.  With no time to savor it, he gulped it down quickly while making his way towards his locker and gathering his books for first class.  English.  They were reading some play about the Salem Witch Trials, something that Kurt definitely didn't need to hear about then or ever.  You'd think that people would have learned from their mistakes about falsely accusing people who had done nothing wrong, who were simply different from the rest of humanity.  But then people always said that history repeated itself. 

Kurt sighed angrily to himself.  He had no idea where all these depressing thoughts were coming from all of a sudden.  He had had dreams like the one last night before and he usually got over it quickly.  This time, though, he could not seem to shake his depression.  But the last time he had had someone to talk with.  He missed Evan; He had been the only one that Kurt would talk to after the nightmares.  Hadn't really had a choice after he had woken screaming from a particularly bad one and had scared Evan near to death.  After that it was easy to talk to Evan and it made things easier to deal with.  Now Evan was gone, had left him alone to deal with his nightmares.  He did not know if he should let someone else in.  What if they left as well? 

Morning classes seemed to fly by and before he knew it the bell for lunch was ringing and he hadn't heard a single word his teachers had said.  He headed to the cafeteria after putting his books away and sat with the other X-Men.  He went through the usual motions of eating and joking around but in reality his mind was a million miles away.  He looked up when he heard laughter and Scott and Jean walked in, his arms around her shoulder and hers around his waist.  Both were smiling and looked so happy that Kurt had to look away again.  The two had finally gotten the courage to talk to each other a few weeks ago.  Well, technically, Kurt had shoved Scott into Jean, who had been sitting on the couch, and Scott had ended up sprawled all over her.  Kurt teleported away hoping that the two would talk.  Apparently all they had needed was a little shove in the right direction. 

Looking at them now, talking and flirting, eyes almost never leaving the other, hands the same, made Kurt wish that just once he could find the same thing.  He was joking himself though.  Who would want someone who looked like a blue furry demon?  But why couldn't he have that just once?  The bell rang again, signaling the end of lunch and Kurt once again went back to the boring routine of classes. 

# 

He got through the rest of the day and actually managed to pay at least some attention to what his teachers were saying.  He was walking through the parking lot when he heard someone jogging up behind him.  He turned to see who it was and was unsurprised to see Scott.  He waited until Scott caught up to him.

"Just checking to see if you wanted a ride home," Scott said. 

"Thanks, Scott, but I think that I will walk home today."

"Look, I know there's something going on and it's okay to talk about it."  Kurt looked up at Scott, truly grateful that he would care enough to make that offer. 

"I know, and I will, but not right now."

"Fair enough.  I'll catch you later then."  Scott turned and began to jog back to where he had left his car and most likely Jean waiting, throwing a quick look back over his shoulder at Kurt.  Kurt watched him for a moment and then turned back to head for the mansion.  Maybe the walk would help clear his mind some. 

As he walked the streets that would lead him home, he once again became lost in his own thoughts.  He did not notice the group of men that had been following him for the last few blocks.  He did not notice when one of them came silently up behind him.  He did not notice until the man aimed a clenched fist at the side of his skull but by then it was too late.  He tried to whip around, tried to teleport, but the man was too fast and smashed his fist into Kurt's temple so that he collapsed in a heap to the ground. 

# 

Kurt groaned as he woke and clawed his way out of the darkness that was surrounding him.  He tried to remember what had happened but all he could remember was a shooting pain through his head and then darkness, the same darkness that was trying to swallow him now.  Groaning again, he forced his eyes to open, vaguely thinking that it really shouldn't be so hard.  Once he had managed to get them open, he found the world was nothing but a gray blur.  He blinked, trying to bring the world back into focus.  He noticed a black form in front of him and realized that he was not alone and that someone was talking to him.

"Time ta wake up, pretty boy.  Can't sit around here all day while you get your beauty sleep."  The voice was distant and Kurt blinked up at the person in front of him and received a sharp backhand to his face that sent him on to his back when he did not respond.

"Maybe this will wake him up," another voice said out of Kurt's view.  His eyes were finally starting to focus now and he recognized the speakers as men.  He was about to ask what was happening when freezing cold water was thrown at his face.  He snapped his head back and came to focus on the men surrounding him.  He could see the sadistic glimmer in their eyes and knew that he was in trouble.  The blows to his head made him groggy and his mind fuzzy and he backed away from them until he hit the wall.  He looked around again and noticed that they were in an alley.  Three men stared down at him, wicked grins across their faces.  Kurt tried to calm his heart, tried not to panic, but was panicking anyway.  His breath came in short gasps and his heart began hammering.  He had to get away was the only coherent thought that he could form. 

He stumbled to his feet and tried to make a break from the alley but the earlier blow to his head made him clumsy and one of the men easily caught him by the arm and slammed his back up against the wall.  Kurt's breath left him in a rush and he stared in horror at the man who held him.  He didn't understand.  Why were they doing this?  He still had the image inducer on and it was working fine.  Only one thought came to his mind but he refused to consider it and pushed it away.

The man breathed alcohol scented breath into his face and Kurt knew that all three of them had to be absolutely smashed.  It would explain why they hadn't noticed his fur yet and tried to kill him for being a mutant. 

Another of the men stepped forward and grabbed hold of Kurt's other arm, pinning him to the wall.  Kurt began thrashing weakly in their hold, head pounding, and his vision hazy.  Their grip was like iron, however, and he was too weak to break free.  In one swift motion they spun him around, his forehead slamming into the hard wall and causing his vision to black out for a moment.  When he came back to his senses, he could feel the arms of the third man fumbling with his trouser button and fly, dropping them and his boxers to his knees.  His mouth was quickly covered as he began screaming.  He began to thrash more violently his panic giving him strength but their grip did not loosen.  He tried to use his powers but could not concentrate, he was too terrified and his head was pounding.  Then there was an intense pain as the man thrust into him and he felt like he was being ripped apart.  He screamed into the hand covering his mouth, nearly choking on his sobs, and jerking desperately against their hold.  His knees buckled as the man continued to pound into him and he would have fallen had it not been for the other two holding him up.  Black spots filled his vision and he could not take anymore and began to pass out, when one of the men holding him smashed his wrist back up against the wall and his image inducer fizzled and died.

The men gasped and leapt back, letting Kurt fall to a crumpled heap on the ground.  The one jerked his pants back up and snarled down at Kurt, who couldn't even find the strength to lift his head.

"No way am I fucking a mutie freak!" 

"Lets get the fuck outta here," one of the ones that had been holding Kurt's arm said.  He kicked Kurt once in the stomach, causing him to start heaving and then took off down the alley, following the other two.

Kurt groaned and managed to sit up slightly.  The movement caused pain to shoot up his spine like fire and he nearly collapsed again.  He took a moment to breathe and try to settle his once again queasy stomach.  After a good ten minutes, he managed to hoist himself to his feet, using a nearby garbage can to lean on.  He struggled with his pants but finally got them pulled up and fastened with trembling fingers.  He refused to think about what had just happened to him and walked on wobbly legs towards the alley's exit.  He didn't get far, though, before his knees buckled and he fell to the ground with a cry of pain. 

What was the point anyway?  He couldn't go back to the X-Men, not now.  If he had thought that what happened to him before was bad, what about now?  What would they think of him?  He was a trained X-Man and he couldn't even defend himself from a group of drunken idiots.  They would think that he was weak and would kick him off the team.  He couldn't go back, couldn't tell them.  But where would he go?  Kurt began to sob softly, trying to stop himself but failing.  He heard a rustle at the end of the alley and jerked his head up but the movement was too fast and he felt the world lurch as he began falling to the side.  Then strong hands were holding him up and he began to struggle weakly against the hold.

"Take it easy, mon ami.  I'm not gonna hurt y'," a voice reassured, one that he recognized.  He looked up and tried to focus through the haze.  Scared and worried red on black eyes stared back at him.

"Gambit?"  His throat felt raw from screaming and he wasn't even sure if he had said the word out loud.  His eyes began to slip shut and he felt Gambit's arms around him. 

"Shit.  I gotta get you back t' Xavier's."  Gambit carefully picked Kurt up and cradled him gently in his arms.  Kurt struggled in his arms and looked into his eyes.

"No!  Please, I can't, please.  Don't take me back, I can't," Kurt managed to sob out, pleading with his eyes for Gambit to understand. 

"Shhh, shhhh, it's okay.  I won' take y' back, I'll take y' someplace else, someplace safe, 'kay?"  Gambit said, trying to calm Kurt who was becoming increasingly agitated.  "Won' take y' back 'till y' ready, bien?"  Kurt nodded against his chest and closed his eyes.  Gambit sighed as Kurt passed out and tried to figure out how he was going to get Kurt out of here without him being seen. 


	2. chapter two

Chapter Two 

After wrapping Kurt up in his trench coat, Remy managed to sneak them both out of the alley.  He wasn't sure where he should or could go.  Kurt had made it clear that he didn't want to go back to the X-Men and Remy didn't blame him.  He couldn't take Kurt to Magneto, he would probably just kick them out again and Remy didn't need the others around bothering them.  The Brotherhood wasn't too fond of either of them so going there was also out of the question.  He could take Kurt to a hotel but then there would be the problem of getting him in without turning too many heads.  But he certainly couldn't stand here all day and made up his mind to try and sneak Kurt into a hotel. 

Luckily it was beginning to get late out so not too many people were around.  The only people who were around were in cars and they barely even glanced at Remy as he walked down the sidewalk, still holding Kurt in his arms.  There was a hotel nearby and Remy headed towards it.  The parking lot seemed pretty well empty and he sat Kurt on a bench outside one of the rooms so that he could go and pay.  He hesitated a moment, he did not want to leave Kurt, who was still unconscious and looked so helpless half slumped over on the bench.  He reached forward and brushed Kurt's long bangs away from his forehead, wincing at the large bump he found there.  He began to worry that Kurt would have a concussion and quickly ran over to the office to get a room. 

After paying for a room with two beds and making sure that there would be a bath, he ran back to Kurt and scooped him up into his arms.  He carried Kurt carefully to room 21 and after fumbling some with the card key got the door unlocked and Kurt settled on one of the beds.  As soon as he was sure that Kurt would be comfortable he sat on the side of the bed and took Kurt's unusual hand in his own.  There was blood on his wrist where the watch had cut into it and Remy knew that his wrists had to be horribly bruised even if he couldn't see it. 

"Kurt?"  He spoke gently, not wanting to startle Kurt awake but he was worried about a concussion and wanted to make sure that Kurt was alright.  "Kurt, mon ami, I need y' t' wake up now."  There was no response.  Remy reached his other hand forward and pushed Kurt's hair back again  "Kurt, please, wake up."  There was a groan and Remy took his hand away, not wanting to scare Kurt anymore.  "Kurt?" He watched Kurt's eyes flutter as Kurt struggled to open them.  A moment later and he was gazing at Remy through blurry vision.  Remy could feel the panic building in the other mutant the moment he saw Remy. Kurt bolted forward but the movement caused him to cry out in pain before falling back against the bed.  He curled up into a ball and began sobbing. 

"Please, no, please, no more..."  The pleas were quiet but still caused Remy's heart to shatter for the boy.  Knowing better than to touch Kurt, he knelt next to the bed.  Remy could feel the pain and fear battering against his shields, mixed in with that was shame and anger.  He wanted to raise his shields against the foreign emotions but did not want to shut Kurt out so he let the feelings wash over him. 

"Kurt, it's just me, remember?  I took y' somewhere safe, dey can' get y' here.  You're safe."  As Remy whispered soft reassurances he reached out to Kurt's mind with his empathy; a gift he absolutely abhorred but he had to try and get through to Kurt.  Sending Kurt all the comfort he could and taking away much of his pain, Remy felt him relax and begin to calm down.  "Kurt?" he said, placing a hand gently on his shoulder.  Kurt shifted and turned his head to gaze at Remy, eyes glistening with unshed tears. 

"Gambit?"  It was nothing more than a whisper and then Kurt was hurling himself forward into Remy's arms and crying brokenly.  For one horrible moment he had been back at the alley and Gambit had been the man who had… who… He couldn't even think it, didn't want to think it, and didn't want to acknowledge that it had ever happened.  He didn't care that this was supposed to be an enemy; he somehow knew that Gambit wouldn't hurt him and right now he needed somebody who would hold him without asking a million questions.  He remembered now that Gambit had helped him, had promised not to take him back to the X-Men and held on tighter, cried harder.  Remy held him back just as tightly, sliding onto the bed to hold Kurt in his lap. 

He didn't want to think about what had happened to him, tried to push it back but he couldn't stop remembering.  He couldn't stop remembering the pain, the grips on his wrists, and the weight of the man behind him.  He was beginning to panic again, found it hard to breath and his head pounded so hard that he just wanted to pass out or start screaming.  Suddenly feelings of comfort and protectiveness washed through him and he looked up at Gambit somehow knowing that these came from him.  Remy ceased whatever he had been mumbling and looked down at Kurt's tear filled eyes. 

"Are you doing that?" Kurt whispered. 

"Oui, just tryin' t' make y' feel better."  Remy seemed unsure and began to withdraw the feelings.  He should have known better!  Kurt didn't want him messing around with his head. 

"No, please don't.  I like it, feels nice."  Kurt dropped his head back down to Remy's chest and Remy hugged him tighter for a moment.  Kurt had stopped sobbing, though his breath occasionally hitched, yet he seemed in no hurry to move away from the comfort of Remy's arms and Remy was in no hurry to release him.  It felt good to be able to take care of somebody for once. 

Pain was shooting up Kurt's spine from the position he was in but he didn't care.  Remy's arms felt too comforting.  He didn't want to leave the circle of security that they created around him.  He felt Remy shift under him and then felt himself being laid down into a more comfortable position.  He was still wrapped in Remy's arms but was now lying on his side.  He sighed in relief and closed his eyes, drifting off into sleep. 

# 

While Kurt slept, Remy went quickly to a small corner store only a block away and picked up some supplies that he figured he might need.  Grabbing a soothing, healing ointment, gauze, aspirin and some food, he paid the man at the counter and practically ran back to the hotel room, not wanting Kurt to wake up alone. 

Once back at the room, he checked to make sure that Kurt was still fine and then took the medicine into the bathroom.  Leaving everything on the counter by the sink he walked over to the bath and twisted the tap on, adjusting the water and making sure that it wasn't too hot.  As soon as the bath was full he shut off the water and set some big fluffy towels next to the bath within easy reach. 

Walking back into the room he saw that Kurt was still curled up on his side, peacefully sleeping, and Remy hated to wake him.  He knew that the sleep wouldn't last long before the nightmares would hit and was tempted to let Kurt sleep while he could.  He was covered in blood and dirt, though, and Remy was afraid that if he let Kurt sleep too long that the concussion he had received would cause him to slip into a coma.  Crouching next to the bed he once again brushed back Kurt's bangs but they fell back into his face.  Remy frowned and tucked the loose strands behind his ear.  Kurt groaned at the gentle touch and began to wake, looking up at Remy with bleary eyes, wishing that Gambit would just let him sleep.  He seemed to ache everywhere, his head still pounded and he felt so tired.  His eyelids seemed far too heavy and they began to drift shut again. 

"Kurt, y' gotta stay 'wake for me, 'kay?"  Kurt's eyes opened once again and looked up at Remy.  Why couldn't he just sleep?  Being awake meant remembering.  "Y' can' be comfortable like dat, I need t' clean y' up but I can' do it wit'out y' help."  Kurt struggled up on his elbows and looked down at himself.  He hadn't really thought about it through the haze of pain that seemed to be clouding his head but now he could see the blood that stained his pants, could feel it matting his fur.  He almost wanted to cry again when he saw the evidence of what had been done to him.  His breath caught on a dry sob and Remy sat back on the bed.  "Come on, wrap y' arms 'round my neck, I'll carry y't' de bat'room." 

Kurt did so and Remy wrapped his own arms around Kurt's back, lifting him into the air so that Kurt's feet were dangling off the ground and his head rested on Remy's shoulder.  The position was surprisingly comfortable and Kurt didn't even notice that they were in the bathroom until he heard Remy asking him a question. 

"Can y' hold on and lean on me?  Got t' put y' feet down, can' clean y' if y' got all y' clothes on."  Kurt searched his eyes for a moment then nodded.  The prospect of being clean drove away all other thoughts or doubts.  Remy literally radiated caring and understanding, making Kurt feel like he was safe and he didn't fight when Remy quickly stripped him of his clothes.  He felt Remy's arms close around him again and was lifted off his feet and placed gently into a tub of warm water.  He closed his eyes and let the water envelope him, marveling at how good it felt.  He shifted some so that he was resting most of his weight on his hip and reluctantly letting go of Remy's neck, draped one arm over the side of the tub. 

"How's dat feel, good?"  For an answer all he got was a murmur of approval as Kurt started to drift off again.  "Don' fall 'sleep yet."  He reached over to the counter and grabbed the bottle of aspirin and a glass of water.  He shook out four aspirin and handed them to Kurt, who had opened his eyes to watch, along with the glass of water.  "Take dese, dey will help wit' de pain."  He watched as Kurt swallowed the pills and satisfied, took the glass away and sat on the edge of the bathtub.  "Gonna wash y' hair so y' might wanna close y' eyes."  Kurt did so and relaxed as Remy ran his hands through his hair getting it wet before working in the shampoo.  He was drifting off again when a sudden thought occurred to him. 

"What's your name?" he asked quietly.  Remy made a questioning sound, rinsing out the shampoo and starting with the conditioner.  "I know you're called Gambit but what is your actual name?" 

"Oh.  It's Remy, Remy LeBeau."  Kurt nodded and Remy finished rinsing out the conditioner.  Remy got up off the edge of the tub and knelt next to it, grabbing a bar of soap and attempting to clean Kurt as thoroughly as he could without making him uncomfortable or triggering flashbacks.  He was mildly surprised that Kurt hadn't had any yet and assumed that he was still in shock over what had happened to him.  He could feel the anger rising in him as the water turned pink from the blood he was washing out of Kurt's fur but managed to rein it in.  He did not want Kurt to think that he was angry with him.  He finished washing Kurt quickly and after rinsing him, Remy leaned over to lift him carefully out of the tub. 

"You're going to get wet," Kurt whispered.  Remy smiled at him.  Kurt could have easily been killed and he was worrying about getting Remy wet. 

"Don' worry 'bout it, I don' mind none." 

He lifted Kurt out of the bath, soaking his shirt in the process, and, after some struggle with the towels, managed to get Kurt dry and snuggled up under the covers on the bed.  Going back to the bathroom, he grabbed the gauze and the ointment and then returned to the room, sitting next to Kurt on the bed.  He propped Kurt, who was drowsy from the bath, up against his chest.  He pushed Kurt's hair away from the back of his head and inspected the gash that he found there.  He was relieved to see that the bleeding had stopped and that it wasn't too deep.  He treated the wound with the ointment and then wrapped the gauze around Kurt's head, covering the gash and the contusion on his forehead.  He had checked Kurt over in the bath for any more injuries and was relieved to find that all bleeding had stopped and that there were no more injuries other than the bruises on his wrists.  He lay Kurt back down and tucked the blankets around him. 

"Get some sleep, 'kay?  I'm gonna be right over dere in de ot'er bed," Remy reassured him.  Kurt nodded and yawned before drifting off into sleep.  Remy walked over to the other bed, slipping off his wet shirt and laying on top of the covers.  Lying on his side, head propped up in his hand, he watched as Kurt slept. 

He would never understand how some people could do something like this to someone who was little more than a child.  What kind of mind did a person have that they could do this and actually get pleasure from it?  Then again, he knew exactly what type of mind it took, had felt them more than once when he had been a child on the streets, fighting to survive.  His mind shuddered away from the memories.  He knew what Kurt was going through now, knew how much pain and humiliation Kurt had to be feeling.  Not just because he was an empath but because he had been in the same position that Kurt was in now. Magneto had helped him get through all the pain, though, maybe he could help Kurt. 

# 

Remy refused to let himself fall asleep, he had to make sure that he woke Kurt every hour due to the concussion.  He occupied most of his time by playing solitaire with the deck of cards that he always had on him or simply watching Kurt as he slept.  There was a TV but the reception was horrible and the channels they did get were not worth bothering with.  He was starting to lose his battle with sleep when pain and terror ripped through his mind and left him grasping his head and panting for breath.  He managed to raise his shields against the onslaught of emotions and looked over to Kurt. 

Kurt had tangled himself in the blankets and was now thrashing and screaming, trying to get away from their hold, locked in a nightmare.  Before Remy could scramble off of his bed and over to Kurt's, Kurt lurched violently to one side and tumbled out of the bed, hitting the floor with a hard thud. 

Remy swore and quickly made it around the bed to where Kurt was laying on the floor, trembling violently, looking dazed and confused, tears streaming down his face.  He knelt in front of Kurt, talking to him all the while and enveloped him in a comforting hug.  Kurt cried into Remy chest, shaking uncontrollably. 

It had happened all over again, only this time it had been all three of the men raping him and beating him, calling him 'mutie trash', 'whore', 'demon'.  He had tried to get away but he didn't have his powers and he was just too damn weak.  All he could do was take whatever they had to dish out and he couldn't help feeling that this was his fault; that he should have been able to do something to stop them.  Then the other X-Men had found him and told him he was too weak, that he would never be an X-Man.  How could he be when he couldn't even defend himself, let alone other mutants?  The others would all look down on him now.  He would be nothing more than a whore in their eyes.  He hadn't fought back hard enough and he hated himself for it.  Kurt hadn't even realized that he was saying all this out loud until Remy took him by the shoulders and pushed him back so that he could look Kurt in the eyes.  Kurt looked back at Remy and saw both anger and determination in his eyes.  He dropped his head.  He had been right, Remy was angry with him.  He felt Remy's hand lift his chin so that he was forced to look into Remy's eyes again. 

"Y' listen t' me, Kurt.  None of dis was your fault!  Y' didn't ask f' dis t' happen an' I know y' tried y' best to stop dem." 

"But I didn't stop them.  I tried but I couldn't and I couldn't teleport and I can see the anger in you now.  You probably think I'm nothing but a pathetic loser."  Kurt's gaze dropped in shame.  Remy pulled Kurt to him again, whispering into his ear. 

"Oh Kurt.  I'm not angry wit' y'.  I'm angry at dose sick fucks who did dis t'y'.  Y' tried and dat's all dat matters.  No one's gonna hate y' or be angry, 'specially not de X-Men.  Dey're y' friends, dey'll understand." 

"I'm sorry, I'm being an idiot." 

"Ain't not'ing t' be sorry for.  Y' didn' do anyt'ing wrong."  There was silence for a moment, Remy holding Kurt.  When Kurt started to shiver slightly he broke the hug and spoke, "Y' can' be comfortable like dat, let's get y' back t' bed"  Remy stood, bringing Kurt up with him and settling him back onto the bed.  After making sure that Kurt was comfortable again he headed back towards his own bed but was stopped when he felt a soft grip on his wrist.  He looked back at Kurt and met shy eyes. 

"I don't think I can sleep alone, I mean, would you mind," Kurt stumbled over his words not sure how or if he should make this request.  Remy smiled down at him, knowing what Kurt was trying to ask.  He slid under the covers with Kurt and settled on his side.  Kurt wanted to ask Remy to hold him but was too shy and ashamed at his weakness.  He was sure that Remy wouldn't want to hold him anyway; Kurt was surprised that he had stayed this long.  Remy seemed to sense his desire though and pulled Kurt close, pulling the quilt over them and rubbing comforting circles over Kurt's back. 

"Thank you," Kurt whispered before falling back to sleep, mind filled with the warm protectiveness that was coming from Remy. 

A/N: SailorWade, nope, this has nothing to do with that vote thingy, this is just something that's been stuck in my mind for a little while and writing it is the only way to get rid of it. So far, the votey thing is at Remy/Roberto but it's still open so if anyone wants to suggest another Remy pairing for me to do, feel free. I'll tell you who won when I finish All That's Left, 'cause I'm not gonna start writing it until I finish that one. One more thing SailorWade. This is ALL YOUR FAULT!!! (lol, I'm just joking) I was thinking about Remy/Roberto yesterday when out of nowhere this Remy/Xavier scene flashes through my mind! ARGH!!! I can't get rid of it!! So, yes, I'm going to blame it on you for putting the idea in my head. God, I think I'm scarring myself, I'm actually considering it *shudder* Anyway, I guess I'll stop creeping everybody out and let you move on to thinking about more pleasant things than Remy and Xavier doing,uh…things…oh God somebody kill me…. 


	3. chapter three

Chapter Three 

Kurt woke and saw that the sun was streaming through the cracks of the blinds which covered the window across the room.  Kurt yawned widely and tried to stretch but the movement sent pain throughout his lower body.  He gasped and cuddled back into the hard thing next to him.  Wait, the hard thing next to him?  Blinking owlishly to himself he looked up and saw Remy lying beside him.  He was on his back, head turned towards Kurt, eyes still closed and the occasional soft snore coming from his lips.  Remy lifted his arm when Kurt cuddled closer; still not waking simply doing so out of instinct and Kurt snuggled under it, sighing contentedly. 

Kurt supposed that he should feel uncomfortable, he was in bed with a man after all, but he didn't, he felt safe and content, maybe not so alone anymore.  He remembered Remy waking him several times during the night, always speaking quietly and reassuring him that he would be alright, it was okay now, he wasn't alone.  The weird thing was that he could feel the truth in those words.  So many people had said them to him before but always it had been a lie, just people saying things in the heat of the moment but never actually following through on what was said.  He needed Remy to be there now, he could not deal with this alone. 

It was just another horrible thing to add to a growing list.  He thought it ironic that the one thing that had caused him so much pain in the past had actually saved him this time.  If those men hadn't broken his image inducer and become afraid of what he really was, then they would have done much worse, Kurt was sure.  It didn't matter whether he looked normal or like a freak, it seemed that people would always hate him. He buried his face into Remy's side and wondered how long it would be before Remy realized this and left as well. 

For now though, he could pretend that everything was fine.  Remy really did care about him, really understood and wouldn't leave when he realized just how worthless Kurt really was.  He was even worse now.  Before he had only been a demon, now he was a demon whore.  Who could ever possibly want him?  He didn't even know why Remy bothered to help at all.  Maybe it would have been better had Remy not found him at all.  He could feel the tears coming again.  God, he was so pathetic!  He felt the hand that was resting on his side move and stiffened when he realized that Remy was waking up. 

Remy felt Kurt stiffen beside him and took his hand away, afraid that he had done something to scare Kurt.  Glancing down at Kurt's face, Remy saw no fear just foreboding.  Lowering his shields, Remy let Kurt's emotions wash over him.  He cringed at the strong feelings of abandonment and insecurity coming off of Kurt.  He tightened his hold. 

"What's de matter, cher?" 

Kurt shook his head against Remy.  "It's nothing."  Kurt paused for a moment and Remy dropped a kiss to his forehead. 

"Please tell me, I only want t' help," Remy whispered.  Kurt seemed to break at the tender kiss that showed no disgust, only love. 

"Why are you helping me?" 

"I'm helping 'cause I care, Kurt." 

Kurt let out a snort of disbelief.  "Nobody really cares.  They all leave!  Why would they want to stay?  Just look at me!  I'm nothing but a demon freak and a whore on top of that!  I'm nothing but a loser who always has to pretend that everything is all right!  You'll leave too once you find out how worthless I am," Kurt whispered this last sentence and tried to pull away.  Surely Remy would now realize the mistake he had made in helping Kurt and push him away anyhow.  He felt Remy's embrace tighten around him and looked at Remy in astonishment.  This was not the way it was supposed to happen. 

"I'm not leaving y', Kurt, an' I certainly don' t'ink dat y' are a demon or a whore an' y' are definitely not worthless."  As he said this, he poured feelings of security, pride and love into Kurt's mind.  He felt Kurt begin to relax against him but didn't loosen his hold.  "When I was a pup, I used t' live on de streets."  Kurt looked up at him in confusion and Remy smiled sadly at him.  "I had t' find a way t' survive 'cause I wasn' about t' give up.  Even if it meant selling everyt'ing I had." 

Kurt gawked at him in disbelief.  "You mean you-"  Remy nodded his head sadly. 

"At first I tried t' stay away from all de pimps and johns on de streets, mais one day someone cornered me an' took what dey wanted.  After dat I didn' have anyt'ing left t' protect so I sold myself.  At least dat way I got money or food outta it." 

"Why are you telling me this?" 

"Now dat y' know my past, do y' t'ink dat I'm a whore?"  Kurt shook his head breathlessly, "When y' see my eyes do y' t'ink 'demon'?"  Again Kurt shook his head.  "When y' see both dose t'ings do y' t'ink dat I'm worthless?" 

"No…" Kurt breathed. 

"Den why would y' t'ink dat y' are?  Y' an' me, Kurt, we be de same.  So if you're a worthless demon whore den so am I." 

"But you're not." 

"Neit'er are y'."  Kurt dropped his head and didn't answer.  There was still doubt in his mind and Remy knew that it would take time to get over something like this.  Remy reached over to the nightstand where he had left a glass of water and the bottle of aspirin the night before.  He handed them to Kurt who took the pills without complaint.  While the pain wasn't as bad anymore it was still there. "Y' hungry?" 

"Kinda."  Kurt's stomach growled and Remy smiled at him. 

"I'll go an' buy us some food an' get us both a change of clot'es.  Sound good?" 

"Yeah, um, you're gonna leave?" 

"Don' worry, I'll lock de door an' be back in an hour, 'kay?"  Kurt nodded but didn't look too sure.  He smoothed Kurt's wild hair down trying to reassure him.  "One hour, I swear." He got off the bed and grabbing his now dry shirt off the floor, tugged it on and headed for the door.  He gave Kurt one last look and was tempted to go back when he saw how small and alone Kurt looked, but they needed food and Kurt needed clothes.  He slipped out of the room, making sure to lock the door after him.  He'd have to hurry if he was to be back in an hour. 

# 

Kurt curled back up on the now empty bed, burying into the pillows and wrapping himself in the blankets.  The sound of footsteps echoed on the sidewalk outside his room and his heart began to jackhammer in his chest.  He held his breath in anticipation but the footsteps continued on past his door without even pausing.  He let out a careful breath.  The room turned silent and he could hear his own breath rasping out.  The walls creaked some and he jumped, turning fearfully towards the sound.  There was nothing there and he realized that it was probably just the boards settling. 

He berated himself for being so foolish, nothing was going to get him in the hotel room and Remy would be back soon.  He was surprised when Remy hadn't pushed him away earlier.  Things were definitely not going the way that he had expected; Remy actually seemed to care about him.  He couldn't figure out why.  Aside from what he had told Remy earlier, they were supposed to be enemies but Remy was helping him.  Shouldn't Remy have dragged him off to Magneto by now?  He probably would have gotten praise for capturing one of the X-Men.  Maybe he had actually gone to get Magneto now, but Remy's empathy told Kurt the truth.  Remy truly wanted to help him, he hadn't been lying. 

Kurt buried his head into the pillow and inhaled deeply, smelling Remy still on it.  He remembered everything that had happened since Remy found him.  Everything he did, every touch and every word, had been so gentle and tender.  It was everything that he had ever wanted; he never wanted this to end.  A sudden thought flashed through his mind, would Remy's kisses be as gentle as his touches or words?  He jerked his head up at the thought.  Where had that come from?  He couldn't be attracted to Remy.  Could he?  This was Remy!  Gambit, an Acolyte, his enemy!  No way could he feel this way.  But he could, he realized, and he did. 

He cringed at himself.  Like Remy would ever want him anyway.  He couldn't stop thinking about how kind and even protective of him Remy was being.  Who was to say that Remy even swung that way?  Kurt had come to terms with the fact that he was bi some time ago.  Had discussed it with Evan.  But he was fooling himself that Remy might be as well.  Besides, it was probably just gratitude he was feeling because Remy had helped him even when he didn't have to.  He was simply feeling attracted to the first person that didn't show disgust or pity when looking at him, nothing would come of it.  That thought disheartened him more than it should have. 

He heard someone walk up to the door and the swipe of a card key through the lock.  His heart began to beat madly again, not out of fear but out of nervousness.  Remy was back and Kurt prayed that he wouldn't notice anything was different.  Kurt would try and act like nothing changed.  Those thoughts skittered away when Remy stepped into the room, a bag held in each hand.  God, he was so gorgeous. 

"Kurt, mon ami?"  Remy took a few steps into the room, looking at Kurt with a mixture of confusion and concern.  His face was blank, like he was in a trance.  Remy worried that he had scared Kurt by leaving and began to berate himself mentally.  "Y' okay, Kurt?" 

"Uh, ja, I'm fine."  Kurt could see that Remy didn't believe him. 

"Wasn' gone t' long, was I?  Tried t' hurry."  Remy came over next to the bed and, after tossing the bags on it, sat down next to Kurt.  Remy began rooting around in one of the bags. 

"No, it's fine."  Remy nodded and handed Kurt a pair of slacks and a t-shirt.  Kurt looked at the clothes then down at himself, blushing fiercely when he realized he had nothing on.  He took the clothes from Remy and looked around nervously. "Thanks, I'll just put these on and, uh…"  He was going to start stuttering he knew it.  Remy smiled at him and, grabbing some clothes for himself, headed to the bathroom. 

"Just gonna grab a quick shower.  Dere's food in de ot'er bag if you're hungry." 

"'Kay," Kurt said as Remy closed the bathroom door.  He dressed quickly, still blushing profusely, thanking God that it wouldn't show under his blue fur.  He rifled through the other bag, finding sandwiches and water.  He began to eat slowly, trying desperately not to think of Remy, in the shower, just across the room. 

# 

Remy couldn't help but smile to himself as he stripped out of his clothes and adjusted to water until it was almost to hot. He stepped beneath the spray and grabbing the shampoo began to lather up.  He did not want to be away from Kurt any longer than he had to. 

His smile broke into a grin for a moment.  This had certainly not been the way he had expected to spend the last few days.  He hated the way this had had to happen but at the same time he was glad that he could get to know Kurt.  He was so different from what he showed everybody.  He was sweet, sensitive, wanting nothing more than to be completely accepted.  That was all Remy had ever wanted as well, to be with someone who wouldn't care about his past or his eyes, just someone who would love him unconditionally.  Was it really so much for them to ask? 

He finished his shower quickly, dressing and brushing his teeth with the toothbrush and paste that he had also got.  Walking out of the bathroom, he laughed quietly when he saw Kurt sitting up on the bed, sandwich wrappers scattered around him.  He cocked an eyebrow at Kurt. 

"Hungry?"  Kurt asked and handed him the last sandwich.  Remy shook his head in amusement and took the sandwich.  Their hands brushed and Kurt dropped his eyes in embarrassment.  Remy looked at him in confusion.  Why was Kurt suddenly acting uncomfortable?  He had been fine before.  Remy dug into the clothes bag and came out with another toothbrush for Kurt.  Kurt grinned at him, grabbed the toothbrush and stood, relieved to find that there was very little pain. 

Remy stared after him as he went into the bathroom.  He wondered if Kurt was uncomfortable with him being a man.  He had just been raped after all.  Maybe it was time to contact the X-Men and let them take over.  The thought saddened him.  He didn't want to lose Kurt yet. 

Feeling vaguely guilty, he opened his shields a little and let Kurt's emotions wash over him.  That sense of abandonment was still there, though not as strong, a small tinge of pain and Remy did his best to draw it out of Kurt.  Then sadness, which Remy could understand, mixed in with apprehension.  Finally, affection and love flooded him and Remy drew back with a gasp.  He tested the feeling again and the love was still there, stronger than most of the others.  Did Kurt love him?  Remy shook his head, more likely it was just gratitude for all that Remy had done.  His empathy told him the truth though.  It was love, there was nothing else, just true love. 

Remy basked in the feelings for a moment.  How often had he dreamed of finding someone like Kurt?  Someone who would love him even after finding out about what he had had to do to survive.  He wanted to confront Kurt with this, see if maybe they could have something together.  However, he knew that now was not the time.  Kurt had just been through something that no person should have to endure and certainly didn't need Remy making moves on him no matter how much he might want it.  Remy would wait until Kurt was recovered and back with the X-Men again before saying anything. 

Remy grinned when Kurt came back into the room, that shy, uncertain expression still on his face. 

"How y' feelin', mon ami?  Better?" Kurt nodded and yawned.  "Y' tired?"  Another sleepy nod.  Remy shifted over on the bed and motioned for Kurt to join him.  Kurt hesitated a moment then slid under the covers.  "Get some sleep, mon ami," Remy whispered as Kurt dropped off.  He reached into his pocket for his cards and laid out a game of solitaire. 

# 

Kurt woke sometime later to see that the sun was just beginning to set.  He looked over at Remy who was propped up next to him staring disinterestedly at the TV.  Remy turned to Kurt and smiled.  Kurt smiled nervously back and Remy had to fight the urge to reach out and push back the bangs that always seemed to hang in Kurt's face. 

"Have a good sleep?" 

"Yeah."  Remy shifted his attention back to the TV.  He did not want to bring up the next subject but knew that he couldn't keep Kurt here forever. 

"In a couple days I t'ink dat you'll be able t' go back t' de X-Men if y' want t'."  Kurt was surprised to hear the note of sorrow to Remy's voice, like he didn't want Kurt to leave. 

"I do want to go back.  I thought about what you said and I know that they only want to help."  He laughed slightly.  "They're probably going nuts trying to find me.  Are you going to go back to Magneto?" 

Remy shrugged his shoulders.  "Don' much know what I'm doing anymore.  Don' get me wrong, I love Magneto like he was a fat'er, but what he's doin'-" Remy shook his head.  "It's like he wants t' enslave de humans, rule dem.  I don' agree wit' dat." 

"Why not join the X-Men?"  Kurt was practically singing inside.  If he could convince Remy to join the X-Men then they wouldn't have to be apart.  They could at least be friends without having to worry about anyone finding out and getting angry because Remy was an enemy. 

"Don' really t'ink I'd be X-Men material." 

"Why?" 

"I ain't never gonna be de perfect good guy.  Not like de rest of y'. I heard what Cyclops did t' Lance, I don' t'ink it would be any different f' me." 

"Cyke just doesn't like Lance; they have this weird feud thing going.  They would accept you though; it's what the X-Men are supposed to be about.  I know the Professor would."  Kurt was all but pleading with him now.  He didn't want Remy to leave.  "At least think about it?" 

Remy sighed but nodded.  "Okay, I'll t'ink about it."  But he already knew the answer.  Kurt wanted him there, therefore, he would be there. 


	4. chapter four

Chapter Four 

They wound up staying at the little hotel for another two days before Kurt decided that he was good enough to go back to the X-Men.  They had not spoken again about Remy joining but Kurt prayed that he would.  In those two days they had learned so much more about each other.  There wasn't much else to do in the hotel room but talk and they could talk for hours, telling each other things that they had never told anyone else.  Kurt also found that his feelings for Remy only increased. 

They had continued to share the same bed, leaving the other one untouched.  One thing that Kurt absolutely loved was how cuddly Remy was when he was asleep.  Every day, they woke up wrapped around each other.  Kurt spent a lot of the first day sleeping, nightmares plagued him but he would always wake to gentle touches and soft words.  He loved Remy for that, for always being there for him, for caring enough to be there for him. 

Sometimes, when Remy looked at him, Kurt could swear that he saw love burning in those garnet and onyx eyes.  A few times, he had caught Remy watching from the corner of his eye.  Could Remy also have feelings for him? 

Kurt shook his head, he couldn't believe that.  No one could ever love him, why would they want to?  He knew that it was foolish to get his hopes up.  Remy could probably have anyone he wanted, why settle for Kurt? 

Now today he was supposed to head back to the X-Men.  Remy would leave, maybe back to Magneto, maybe head off on his own but he certainly wouldn't join the X-Men just because Kurt had asked him to.  Hell, he would probably be happy that he was finally getting rid of Kurt. 

Remy had left two hours ago, not telling Kurt where, just that he had some business that he had to take care of and would be back shortly.  Kurt forced himself up from the bed and shuffled his way to the bathroom.  The pain was gone now and he figured that maybe a shower would help to dispel this depression that seemed to loom over him. 

Once inside the bathroom, he stripped out of his clothes and turned to the shower.  As he turned, he caught his reflection in the mirror and dropped his head in disgust and shame.  How could anyone stand the sight of him?  He knew that Remy had said that he wasn't a demon or a whore but he couldn't quite bring himself to believe it. 

He raised his head again and glared at himself in the mirror.  The bandages had been removed the other day, but he could still see the slight knot on his forehead.  Blue fur, yellow eyes, he snorted at himself.  Even other mutants were afraid of him, Kitty was proof of that.  He was a freak and could barely stand the sight of himself anymore.  If he couldn't even stand the sight of himself then who would? 

He felt tempted to just shatter the glass so that he wouldn't have to look at himself anymore but he shook the thought away and stepped into the shower.  He did not want Remy thinking that anything was wrong.  Remy would question him if he found Kurt in the bathroom with a broken mirror and talking about this would mean bringing up his attraction.  He did not want Remy to know, did not want to face his rejection. 

He turned his face up to let the steamy water slide over him and turned his thoughts to other matters.  Like the X-Men.  They would want to know where he had been these past few days, were probably going crazy trying to find him right now.  He felt bad for not contacting them but he didn't want them to know.  He wouldn't be able to stand the pity or false understanding in their eyes. 

He would have to tell them the truth, though.  The Professor or Logan would know the moment that he started lying to them.  Would he be able to show his face among the X-Men once they knew?  They would all be disgusted with him, he was sure.  Maybe they would kick him out, despise him for his weakness. 

If they did let him stay it would be out of pity not because they wanted him to.  Things would never be the same.  He'd lose all his friends; everything he had worked so hard to gain here would be lost.  Maybe he could leave with Remy and they could go somewhere far away from the X-Men.  He laughed bitterly.  Like Remy would want him tagging along.  He was nothing but a burden. 

He was jerked from his dismal thoughts when someone knocked on the bathroom door. 

"Kurt, y' almost ready t' leave?" 

Kurt almost told him no, he wasn't going anywhere but held his tongue and whispered, "Yes," instead.  He heard Remy walk away and begin to gather the few things he had brought.  Kurt forced his thoughts to stop and quickly finished his shower.  He was sure that Remy couldn't wait to get rid of him. 

He dressed quickly, finished cleaning up and stepped out of the bathroom.  Remy was sitting across the room in one of the chairs, obviously waiting for him.  Kurt swallowed, tried to stop his depression from showing and made his way over to Remy. 

"I'm ready to go," he said, trying to sound happy about the prospect of heading home.  He knew he failed when Remy raised a disbelieving eyebrow at him.  Remy gestured for Kurt to take a seat in the chair opposite him and Kurt did so after a moment's hesitation. 

"What's de matter, Kurt?" Remy almost laughed at the look of surprise on Kurt's face, when would people learn that it was impossible to lie to an empath? 

"There's nothing the matter," Kurt said shyly. 

"Don' lie t' me, mon ami.  Can feel y' hurtin'.  Y' scared t' go back t' de X-Men?"  Kurt nodded, realizing that Remy already knew anyway and maybe talking about it would help.  "Why?" 

"I don't want to see the looks in their eyes when they find out what happened.  I don't want them to kick me out or tell me what a loser I am," Kurt finished bitterly, voice full of self-hatred.  Remy sighed and knelt in front of Kurt, taking Kurt's hands in his own. 

"Told y' before dat dey aren't going t' hate y'.  Dey care about y' and dey will help y' if y' let dem."  There was such conviction in Remy's voice and Kurt looked at him, full of hope.  He knew it was all true, he just needed to hear someone say it. 

"I can't do this on my own," Kurt whispered. 

"Y' don' have t'."  Kurt looked down at Remy in surprise and locked gazes with him.  "I'm not going anywhere; let me be dere for y'." 

"You're coming?  Staying?" Remy smiled at the look of hope in Kurt's eyes. 

"Oui, I'm comin'.  Not gonna let y' deal wit' dis on y' own.  Told Magneto dat I wasn' coming back.  I care about y' Kurt."  Anything else Remy might have been about to say was forgotten as Kurt fell forward into his arms, holding him tightly.  Remy held him back, surprised at the sudden show of affection.  His resolve to wait to tell Kurt what he felt was fading.  He wanted to be able to hold Kurt like this always. 

When Kurt lifted his head from Remy's chest to gaze up at him, eyes sparkling with hope and love Remy couldn't help but drop a tender kiss to Kurt's brow.  He let his hands tangle in Kurt's hair as he pushed it back. 

"Remy…"  Kurt breathed slightly nervous.  No way could Remy's eyes actually be shining with want and love.  Kurt figured that he must be having a really, really good dream, one that he hoped he wouldn't wake up from. 

Remy looked down into eyes draped with love, showing no signs of fear or wanting to stop.  Remy sighed and leaned in again, brushing his lips feather light over Kurt's in a tentative kiss.  Kurt gasped at the contact and Remy drew back, afraid he had done something wrong. 

"Please, don't stop…" Kurt whispered. 

Remy didn't need to be told again and resumed the kiss, this time deepening it slightly, tracing the outside of Kurt's lips with his tongue and exploring Kurt's mouth when he opened in invitation, loving the candy taste. 

Kurt felt like he was in heaven.  He never wanted this perfect moment to stop.  He couldn't believe it!  Remy was kissing him, wanted him in that way.  He slipped his hands around Remy's waist, pulling himself closer and opening his mouth.  Remy tasted like smoke and spice and Kurt would never forget it. 

He groaned when Remy drew away and had to force his now heavy eyes open.  He looked into Remy's laughing, loving eyes and smiled shyly at him.  They didn't release their holds on each other yet, just sat in comfortable silence. 

"You're really going to stay?"  Kurt asked uncertain of himself.  He still couldn't figure out why Remy would want him. 

"Oui, not going t' leave y', cher."  Remy stroked his hands soothingly through Kurt's hair.  Kurt looked confused. 

"I don't understand.  Why would you want me?  I'm not worth-" Kurt was silenced by a finger over his lips. 

"Y' are worth everything in de world and more.  If I have t' spend de rest of eternity tryin' t' prove it t' y' den I will," Remy whispered passionately, leaning forward to claim Kurt's lips in another soul searing kiss. 

Kurt surrendered to the kiss with equal passion.  Maybe Remy was right, maybe he was worth it.  He felt like a weight had been lifted from him, knew it was because he now had someone to help him carry it.  He could face the X-Men with Remy at his side and in the end he knew that everything would be okay.  Because now he had Remy and Remy had him.  Maybe they had finally found what was missing from both their lives. 

END?? 

A/N: Aww, it's the end and I can't really think of anything to say. I might do more but I'm not sure yet, we'll have to wait and see. If I do write more it won't be for awhile though. So, hope y'all enjoyed!! Please, don't forget to review :D 


	5. chapter five

Here you beggars, more story for you since y'all asked so nicely and it's impossible to leave these two alone they are just too cute! Yeah, I meant to have this out like a week ago but erm, well I have no excuses all that counts is that it's out now, yes? Do enjoy mes amis there shall be more to come… 

Chapter Five 

Scott paced back and forth in the rec room angrily.  He couldn't believe that they had failed to find Kurt yet again.  They had been searching for four days now and even Wolverine had barely found a trace of him.  The Professor and Jean had been doing telepathic sweeps ever since they had realized that Kurt was gone.  A few times they had gotten brief readings but it would be gone again before they had the chance to get a lock on him or make any type of contact.  At least they knew that Kurt was still alive. 

Scott blamed himself for not talking to Kurt when he had the chance.  Maybe if he had spoken with Kurt this could have somehow been avoided.  He should have insisted that he give Kurt a ride home or walked home with him.  Not that it mattered now. 

Kurt had looked so terrified in the kitchen that night that it had nearly given Scott a heart attack as well.  The entire next day Kurt had been depressed, Scott could see it in his eyes even though he acted happy and Scott realized that the depression had always been there, hidden behind the mask.  He had never even thought that Kurt might not be anything except what he let everyone see.  He knew better now, though, and would not make that mistake again. 

At first, he had thought that maybe Kurt had run away but when neither Wolverine nor the telepaths could find him, Scott knew that somebody had to have done something to Kurt. 

They had checked out the Brotherhood but they insisted that they had nothing to do with Kurt's disappearance.  Wolverine had confirmed that they were telling the truth. 

Just now they had finished searching another area of Bayville but it had been yet another dead end; no sign of Kurt.  Scott was beginning to think that Kurt would be lost to them forever.  Scott pulled himself out of his dark musing when he heard Jean enter the room.  She looked like she was about ready to boil over with excitement and he raised an eyebrow at her in question. 

"Kurt's home," she almost squealed.  Scott turned and was about to run to the main entrance when Jean stopped him.  "He's not alone though." 

"What do you mean?"  He wished that she would hurry, he had to go and see that Kurt was fine with his own eyes but Jean was delaying him. 

"One of Magneto's people is with him." 

"What?!"  He turned away from Jean again and proceeded to run for the main entrance. 

"Scott!  We don't know anything about what went on, so try and be civil!"  Scott didn't bother with an answer, already out of the room.  There was no way an Acolyte could be anything but bad news and Scott wasn't about to let him do any more harm than he had probably already caused. 

# 

Remy told him that he wanted Kurt to speak with both the Professor and Hank, that he wanted Kurt to tell them the truth about what happened.  The whole truth.  Even about the rape.  Kurt tried to argue with him, to tell Remy that he was okay, that they didn't need to bother anyone with his problems.  It was over so why even bring it up again when it would be easier to just forget about it? 

Remy explained it to him.  It wasn't over yet.  He had to be tested, what if he had picked something up?  They couldn't take the risk, Hank had to know.  The Professor had to know because he was Kurt's teacher and guardian, he had a right to know and he might be able to help Kurt work through it.  That was it though.  Kurt refused to tell anybody else and Remy had agreed, nobody else needed to know. 

They were now sitting on the bike, which Remy had brought back with him when he had left Kurt for a couple hours earlier that day, in front of the large iron gates of the mansion.  Kurt was beginning to get doubts again.  What if the Professor told everybody else?  What if Hank's tests came back positive?  That possibility terrified him.  Wouldn't it be easier to never know? 

But he was with an empath and Remy sensed his fear.  Half twisting in his seat, Remy faced Kurt and cupped his cheek with one hand.  Kurt swallowed and met Remy's eyes. 

"I don't know if I can do this," he whispered.  Remy had shut off the bikes engine and, so, had no problems hearing him. 

"I know dat y' can, cher.  Y' don' have t' do dis alone; I'm gonna be right dere t' help y'.  I swear," Remy said passionately.  He sent a wave of love and comfort to Kurt, feeling him relax some.  He brushed his thumb over Kurt's jaw once before turning back to the gates.  He left the empathic link open between them, wanting Kurt to know that he would be there.  Pushing the bike forward and he grinned into the camera that was set into the wall, speaking into the intercom. 

"T'ink I found somet'ing y'all might want back," Remy said flippantly.  Kurt could tell that Remy was more nervous than he was showing.  He began to feel selfish.  He hadn't even thought about how hard it had to be on Remy coming here.  He was about to face his previous enemies and all Kurt could think of was himself?  How big of a jerk was he? 

Remy felt the sudden concern and tried to reassure Kurt.  The gates creaked open before them and, after taking a steadying breath, Remy started the bike and headed up the driveway. 

Even though he didn't show it Remy's nervousness increased the closer they got to the mansion, Kurt could feel it pulsing across the link.  Kurt was beginning to think that this had been a bad idea, not only for himself but for Remy as well.  At the same time however, he couldn't help feeling that it might be nice to see his friends again. 

Peering over Remy's shoulder, he could already see several people were gathering on the steps.  He figured that he should feel guilty for making them worry but he couldn't bring himself to.  He was glad that he had stayed away, not the least of which was because if he had chosen go home right away Remy would not be here with him now, would not be staying. 

Seeing his friends and what he now considered his home did bring a wave of relief over him but that was instantly followed by the fear that they would no longer want to be his friends if they found out what happened.  He didn't even want to think about what they would say about him and Remy. 

As they pulled up in front of the mansion he pushed his thoughts away and let his usual mask of joyful joker slip easily back into place.  He gave Remy a quick squeeze around the waist where he had been holding on, to both give and receive reassurance, and smiled slightly when one of Remy's hands dropped momentarily to cover his.  He then hoped off the bike and turned to face the X-Men that waited for him. 

"Kurt!  Like where the heck have you been?  I've been worried sick about you!"  Kitty yelled as she ran forward and practically bowled Kurt over as she leapt at him, hugging him fiercely. 

"Sorry, Kitty.  I just had some things I had to think about," he lied easily, hugging Kitty back. 

"You jerk!  Don't ever do that again!" she chided.  He chuckled at her. 

"Don't worry, I don't plan on it." 

"Where have ya been, Kurt?" Rogue asked, giving him a quick hug.  Everybody else seconded her question.  Kurt studied them for a second. 

"Well, I was walking home from school when suddenly this bird flew by and attacked me-" 

"A bird?" Rogue questioned flatly. 

"Do you want to hear the story or not?"  Rogue held up her hands and gestured for him to continue.  "Where was I?  Oh, yes a bird attacked and knocked me backwards into a portal that sent me to another dimension where I had to fight with my alternate self who was trying to take over the world.  I won, of course, and the people turned me into a god and showered me with riches.  They offered me a place to stay but I declined and came back here after giving all my gold to the poor people," Kurt finished.  Everybody just stared at him like he was insane and he grinned back at them, feeling the amusement that came from Remy. 

"You're full of bull," Bobby replied.  The distraction of his story worked though and everyone went back to expressing how glad they were that he was back. 

# 

Remy watched silently from his seat on the bike as Kurt greeted his friends, receiving hugs and words of cheerfulness at his return.  Kurt was grinning and joking but Remy knew that underneath that mask he was uncomfortable.  Kurt had so far managed to dodge any questions concerning where he had been but he wouldn't be able to avoid them forever. 

They mostly ignored Remy, except for a few suspicious looks or glares directed his way.  He was fine with it though, he didn't want to answer their questions until after he had the chance to speak with Xavier who had yet to make his appearance. 

Remy sat back, content to watch Kurt who, though still marginally uncomfortable, was truly happy to be back with his friends again.  Remy felt a sudden pang of jealousy, unwarranted he knew, but he didn't want to have to share Kurt.  He had gotten used to having Kurt to himself for these past few days.  It made him wish, vaguely, that he had listened to Kurt and that they had gone off on their own.  But he couldn't lock Kurt away from his friends and family just because he didn't feel like sharing so he pushed the childish jealousy aside and hoped that Kurt hadn't noticed it through the link. 

Kurt didn't notice, too caught up in greeting his friends that he seemed to have forgotten Remy was there at all.  What if Kurt did forget about him? 

This time Kurt did turn to look at him, feeling the fear and abandonment that seemed to drip down the link.  Remy smiled at him a bit sheepishly, knowing that he had been caught brooding.  And as Kurt's attention turned to him so did the rest of the X-Men's that were gathered on the steps.  Remy stared back at them indifferently, an almost bored expression on his face.  It was Cyclops who finally spoke first. 

"How did *you* find Kurt anyway?" 

Remy smiled a little sardonically at him.  "Guess I jus' happened t' be at de right place." 

Scott seemed to be frustrated with his less than elaborate response but Remy wasn't about to divulge any information that would give him a clue as to what had happened.  "And just how long ago did you *find* him?"  It was obvious that Scott didn't believe him but Remy couldn't really blame Scott for it.  He was the enemy after all, or at least that's what Scott thought.  It still didn't stop Remy from becoming angry at Scott's superior attitude towards him. 

He was about to bite out a sarcastic response when Kurt stepped in between them, stilling the argument.  The other X-Men watched in wary curiosity. 

"Calm down, Scott."  Cyclops looked at him in surprise as Kurt stood beside Remy almost protectively.  "Remy didn't do anything to hurt me; I might not even be here now if he hadn't found me." 

Scott was silent for a moment, studying Remy skeptically.  "*Remy*?"  He clearly did not think that Remy had any good intentions being here.  Remy could feel the angry pulse from Kurt. 

"It's his name, Scott," Kurt bit out. 

"Why would an *Acolyte* help you?" Scott asked snidely.  Remy sneered at Scott and stepped closer to him. 

"Y' t'ink y' know anyt'ing about me?"  Neither of them got the chance to say anything more as the professor finally made his appearance. 

"Scott," Xavier warned.  Scott hesitated a moment before backing down, though he still kept a wary eye on Remy.  "Kurt, Gambit," he acknowledged them both.  "I would like to speak with you both in my office."  Remy and Kurt shared a glance, Remy silently telling Kurt that it would be okay, before they turned and followed Xavier into the house. 

# 

Kurt let himself fall back into one of the large comfy chairs that were set up in Xavier's office facing his desk.  He knew what the Professor would want to speak with them about and knew that he would have to tell the truth.  Telling the Professor some far out tale would not work to distract him like it did the others and Kurt could feel his good mood from only moments before evaporating.  Remy stood by his side though, one hand resting lightly on his shoulder and he drew strength from that simple contact. 

The Professor looked at them both in what Kurt thought was confusion and interest.  What could possibly be confusing the Professor, the man was a genius?  Xavier fixed his gaze on Gambit before speaking, his brows furrowed slightly. 

"Gambit, are you a telepath?" 

Gambit was surprised by the question, not understanding why Xavier would think that.  "Non.  Why?"  His confusion was evident in his voice. 

"You are not only shielding your own mind but Kurt's as well, it's like the two of you are not even in the room, though I can clearly see you I can not feel your minds.  Do you have any type of mental ability?"  Remy narrowed his eyes, ignoring the Professor's question. 

"Y' trying t' read our minds now, homme?" 

"I would not read someone's mind unless they gave me permission," Xavier replied calmly.

"Actually…maybe that's not such a bad idea," Kurt spoke up softly.  Remy looked down at him concerned. 

"Lettin' him read y' mind?" 

"I don't…"  Kurt swallowed and tried to speak again.  "I don't think I can say…what happened…"  He tried to calm himself and slow his heartbeat, forcing himself away from the panic attack that he knew was about to happen.  "It would be easier…" 

"Y' sure?" Remy asked softly, squeezing Kurt's shoulder.  He looked down at Kurt in concern, obviously not thinking that this was a good idea but Kurt trusted the professor and nodded his head. 

The Professor watched their exchange silently, wondering at the fierce protectiveness that seemed to radiate off Gambit.  Once he saw Kurt nod his head he smiled, glad that Kurt trusted him. 

"Would you like to start now?"  Xavier was beginning to grow more worried by the moment.  He didn't want to imagine what might have happened to Kurt to reduce the boy to this obviously terrified state. 

Kurt didn't answer; too busy trying to keep himself from breaking down completely in front of the Professor. 

"I t'ink dat Beast needs t' be here as well," Gambit said.  Xavier looked startled by the request but decided to leave the questions for later. 

"Very well.  Why don't you come back here in an hour then, Kurt?  Until then there are several people who have missed you and I'm sure would like the opportunity to see you again.  Kurt nodded his head, glad that he would be able to collect himself before he came back.  He stood and teleported out of the office and to his room.  All he wanted right now was to be alone and gather himself before meeting with the Professor and Hank. 

Remy blinked at the spot where Kurt had been before turning to the Professor.  "Should I be expecting you at that time as well Gambit, or will you be going back to Magneto?"  No judgment colored his tone. 

"Dat's somet'ing I need t' speak wit' y' about," Remy admitted.  Xavier waited patiently for him to continue.  "I'd like t' join de X-men," he said bluntly.  Xavier was taken aback for a moment. 

"I must admit that this is a surprise.  Might I ask what your reasons for wanting to join are?" 

"Reason, actually.  Kurt, I'm not leaving him," Remy said in a tone that brooked no argument.  Xavier smiled at him. 

"You seem to care a great deal for him." 

"Oui an' he asked me t' be here so I am not leaving." 

"No one is going to ask you to leave, Remy.  You are welcome to stay here."  Remy snorted at that but elected not to say anything.  He doubted that Scott, or any of the others for that matter, would be too happy to have him here.  He nodded politely at the Professor and quickly took his leave anxious to get to Kurt and make sure that he was okay. 

# 

Fifteen minutes later Remy was aimlessly wandering the halls having no idea where Kurt's room was.  He knocked on all the doors he passed hoping that eventually he would have to come to the right one.  That was if Kurt had even gone to his room, but the fact was he could be anywhere.  Remy was seriously beginning to consider asking for help.  He knocked on another door and was surprised when he actually got a reply, even if it wasn't the one that he had hoped for. 

"What the hell do ya want?  That had better not be you again Bobby or Ah swear ta God-"  The door swung open and revealed a gothic girl with a white strip in her bangs.  Remy distinctly remembered trying to blow up her hand the last time they had met and knew that this would not be very pleasant. 

"Uh, hey, chere," he greeted.  She glared at him.  From the look of that glare Remy wondered if he should start running now. 

"Shouldn't y'all be back with Magneto by now?" 

Remy grinned at her a little smugly.  "Actually I be an X-Man now so I t'ink I'll be hanging around a bit."  Her look of shocked surprise turned to outright anger and Remy figured that now would be a good time to make his retreat.  "I was just wondering where Kurt's room was." 

"An' what makes ya think Ah'm gonna tell ya that?" 

"If y' tell me I'll leave y' alone?" Remy tried hopefully. 

"Tempting, but if Kurt wanted ya ta know where his room was Ah'm sure he woulda told ya."  She seemed like she was about to go back into her room but faced him once more.  "Ah better not find out that ya did anything ta hurt him, Cajun, or you're gonna start wishin' that ya never showed up here."  That said she turned back into her room and slammed the door in his face.  Remy stood there for a second before shrugging and continuing down the hallway knocking on doors as he went.  Luckily it was only a few more minutes before another mutant came down the hall towards him, Kitty he had heard Kurt call her. 

"Hey, are you like lost?" she asked happily. 

"I'm trying t' find Kurt's room," he explained. 

"You're standing right next to it," she said in amusement.  Remy turned his head to look at the door by his side. 

"Oh. T'anks."  He reached for the doorknob but turned to look at Kitty who stood watching him. 

"I guess I'll just be going then," she said a little awkwardly before turning and running off to her and Rogue's room.  Remy shook his head and twisted the knob, stepping into the room.  Remy looked around the darkened room for a moment and spotted Kurt standing by the window.  He walked up behind Kurt and wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist.  Kurt leaned back into him. 

"Hey cher," he whispered. 

"I'm sorry for leaving; I just didn't want to be in there any longer."  Kurt turned in Remy's arms and looked up into Remy's eyes. 

"'S'okay," Remy murmured, placing a kiss on Kurt's hair. 

"Do we have to do this?" 

"Oui, y' know we do." 

"It's hard." 

"I know, but don' forget dat I'll be dere wit' y'.  Told de Professor dat I wanted t' join up." 

Kurt looked at him hopefully.  "And?" 

Remy smiled at him.  "Looks like I'm an X-Man, cher."  Kurt grinned and Remy couldn't help but to grin along with him.  Kurt could feel the uncertainty though and looked back down, smile vanishing. 

"I'm sorry. I keep forgetting that this is hard on you too." 

"Oui, but dat's alright, we'll get t'rough dis toget'er, non?" 

Kurt looked back up at him with a small smile.  "Ja, we will."  He leaned in and kissed Remy still a little unsure but soon forgot any hesitance as Remy kissed him back. 


	6. chapter six

Patience is a virtue you know? I'm sorry that it took so long though. Anyway, without further ado, here is the next chapter. Enjoy:D 

Chapter Six 

Less than an hour later found Remy and Kurt sitting in Professor Xavier's office once again, only this time, they were joined by a blue and furry doctor. 

Hank looked Kurt over when he stepped into the office and noticed the now small bump on his forehead but otherwise could see nothing physically wrong with the boy that would indicate why his presence was needed.  Kurt looked nervous, though, his eyes darting around the office, ready to bolt.  It was obvious that he had to restrain himself from leaning back into Gambit who had entered behind him; his tail had wound itself around one of Gambit's legs, though whether this was unconscious on Kurt's part or not, Hank couldn't tell. 

Gambit hovered over Kurt protectively and Hank wondered how the two had formed such a fast and obviously strong bond.  Gambit slipped an arm around Kurt's shoulders and Hank had to conceal his surprise at the intimacy of that gesture.  Perhaps there was more going on between these two than he had originally thought. 

They settled on the small couch that ran along one wall of the office, Kurt's tail not releasing its grip on Gambit's leg and Gambit still holding Kurt protectively.  Hank couldn't help but smile at how, well, cute they looked like that.  Whatever had happened to Kurt - and he was getting the unsettling feeling that it was something far worse than he could have imagined - he was now glad that Gambit had been there to help him.  With that thought in mind he turned to the pair and suggested that Gambit stay with them and join as an X-Man.  Gambit chuckled at him. 

"Actually I've already decided t' stay.  Spoke wit' de Professor about it earlier." 

"Ah, excellent.  I hope that you will get along well here with all the other students."  Gambit nodded at him but looked doubtful.  Hank knew that some of the other students here, Scott especially, would have a hard time accepting him since he used to work for Magneto.  But they would all come around once they realized that Gambit meant no harm, and Hank was sure that he didn't, if the obvious worry over Kurt was any indicator. 

The Professor cleared his throat and they turned their attention to him.  "Are we ready to proceed then?"  The question was mostly directed at Kurt and he gave a hesitant nod.  The Professor positioned his hover chair so that he was in front of Kurt and Gambit.  He took hold of one of Kurt's hands, wanting to make the telepathic contact as easy as possible.  "Gambit, you will need to lower the shields."  Gambit looked at him warily before nodding his ascent and lowering the shields that he had put around Kurt's mind to keep him hidden when he hadn't wanted to be found. 

"Are you sure about this Kurt?" Xavier asked, wanting to make sure that he had Kurt's explicit permission before reading his mind.  "I will not look at anything else; just try to concentrate on what happened."  Not realizing how hard it was for Kurt to actually, purposefully, think back on what had happened, the professor waited for Kurt to nod his head before continuing. 

Xavier first linked himself with Hank and then linked the both of them to Kurt's mind.  A moment later and both Hank and Charles stood in the black plane that was Kurt's mind in their astral forms.  The occasional image or memory would flicker but they were not the ones that Xavier wanted to see and so were ignored.  Xavier waited a moment, hoping that Kurt would join them but there was no sign. 

"Where is Kurt?" Beast asked in confusion, watching one memory as it played out seemingly in the distance. 

"I believe that he is too afraid to join us."  Xavier sounded upset.  What could possibly have upset Kurt so badly that he would be this afraid of it?  He was about to find out as a new scene played out in front of them.  They watched in horror as the men got hold of Kurt and the rape unfolded before them.  They could feel the pain, fear and humiliation that came from Kurt's mind as he relived this traumatic experience, the feelings seeming to crash through them like waves in their intensity.  The scene came to an end with Remy finding Kurt and a soft voice echoed through the blackness as the memory faded from view. 

"Please, stop…" Kurt pleaded them. 

"Of course, Kurt," Xavier said quietly.  Hank shared a glance with him, neither of them quite able to come to grips with what they had just seen.  The usually calm and gentle Hank wanted nothing more than to live up to his code name of Beast right then and destroy those that had dared to hurt Kurt in this way, but he kept his rage back not wanting to inadvertently hurt Kurt with it. 

Hank felt the slightly dizzy feeling that came with his being suddenly back in his own mind and opened his eyes to gaze at Kurt.  Great wracking sobs shook Kurt's body as he buried his face into Gambit's chest.  Gambit held him tightly, glaring at the Professor even though he knew that the Professor was not to blame.  He needed to lash out at something and the Professor was the closest thing that he could aim his anger at. 

Hank put a calming hand on the young man's shoulder as he could see that an argument was most likely about to start between Gambit and the Professor.  Gambit turned briefly to glare at Hank before turning his attention back to Kurt, deciding to ignore the others and whisper comforts into his ear.  It took a few minutes but Kurt was finally calm enough to look up at them though shame colored his eyes and the occasional tear still wound its way down his face. 

"Kurt, you do know that none of this is your fault?" the Professor questioned calmly.  Kurt turned his head back into Remy so that when he spoke his voice was muffled. 

"Can I go back to my room now?" Kurt asked instead of answering. 

"Cher, y' have t' let Hank test y' 'member?" Remy questioned, tilting Kurt's head up so that he could look in Kurt's eyes.  Kurt turned his gaze to Hank and looked at him pleadingly.  Hank shook his head softly. 

"I'm sorry Kurt, but Gambit is right.  We should not put this off.  It will only take a few moments.  All I need is some blood and then you may go back to your room if you wish." 

Kurt swallowed and nodded.  He stood, finally unwinding his tail from Remy's leg.  Remy stood behind them and they followed Hank out the door, Remy with a slight hobble to his step.  At Hank's questioning look, he smiled and shrugged. 

"My legs asleep."  Kurt looked up at him in surprise as Hank just smiled and nodded in understanding. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" Kurt began but Remy cut him off. 

"Y' worry too much, cher, 's'okay." 

They walked silently out of the office, Hank leading the way, Xavier bringing up the rear, and made their way towards the med lab passing a shocked Iceman on the way.  The blood was taken without a fuss and they were told that it would be at least three days before they had the results back.  Hank would call them the minute he knew. 

"Remy," Xavier said as they headed back for the upper levels of the mansion.  "I would like to speak with you in my office." 

Remy stopped and faced Kurt.  "Y' gonna be okay, cher?" 

Kurt nodded.  "I just want to go to my room and sleep for awhile."  He offered a shaky smile.  The day's events had left him emotionally drained and he wanted nothing more than to collapse into oblivion for a few hours.  Remy released his grip around Kurt's shoulders and stepped back so that Kurt could teleport away to his room.  Once he was gone Remy turned back to the Professor. 

"Let's go den." 

# 

"What did y' want t' talk about?" Gambit asked once they were back in the Professor's office. 

"Your empathic link with Kurt," the Professor put bluntly.  He had sensed the link when he had been in Kurt's mind. 

"What about it?" Gambit said slightly defensively. 

"You cannot use it to shut Kurt away from his own feelings."  Gambit was about to object but the Professor raised a hand to stop him.  "You have been using your own positive feelings to counteract Kurt's negative ones, yes?" 

Remy nodded hesitantly, unsure of where this was going.  "Oui…" 

"I know that you are just trying to help him but he cannot ignore or push those feelings away or he will never truly recover from this.  He must work through what he is feeling but to do that, you have to let him." 

"I don' want t' see him hurting." 

"None of us do, but you can not deny Kurt his own feelings or push them back, they will simply continue to build up which would result in an emotional breakdown.  If you want him to heal then you must let him work through this.  I'm not saying that you shouldn't be there to help him, it will be very hard on him, but what it comes down to is that you are manipulating his negative emotions and in the long run that can do him no good." 

"I'm **not** manipulatin' him." 

"Perhaps that was a bad choice of words," the Professor conceded.  "But you are…covering his negative emotions with your own positive ones.  Do you understand?" 

"Oui, stop coddling Kurt 'cause he needs t' deal wit' it eventually." 

"I'm not saying that you shouldn't be there to help him through it mind you, or that you should break the link, just do not stop him from feeling, even if what he is feeling is not something you'd want him to..  It is wrong to take away another person's emotions…" 

"I understand. Its jus'…hard t' see him hurting, so afraid…" he trailed off. 

"We will find a way to deal with it."  Xavier smiled at him and there was silence for a moment.  "We need to discuss sleeping arrangements for you," Xavier said thoughtfully.  He could easily tell Remy's thoughts without having to read his mind and smiled.  "While I would normally allow you to stay in a room with Kurt, since the two of you are… romantically involved, I will not be doing so."  Gambit rolled his eyes but said nothing, waiting for Xavier to continue.  "Other than Kurt's, I'm afraid that the only room available is Scott's." 

Remy looked at him skeptically.  "Are y' sure 'bout dat?  Don' t'ink de homme be t' fond of me, neh?" 

"I'm sure that the two of you will learn to get along fine."  Remy did not look so sure… 

# 

Kurt had not been in his room as Remy had expected and he didn't think that Kurt would go wandering the mansion, especially after the session with the Professor and Hank.  So, he decided that he may as well wander the mansion again, after all, it had worked the last time he wanted to find Kurt. 

It didn't take him long to walk by the bathrooms and, upon hearing the shower going, thought that Kurt might be the one using it.  It would most likely be disaster though if he was wrong and walked in on Rogue or something, so knocking first would be a good thing.  He raised his fist and rapped lightly on the door. 

"Kurt?  Dat y'?"  There was no answer save for a pulse of sudden recognition through the link.  Remy did not need a verbal answer after that.  "C'n I come in?"  A vague sense of relief was his answer and Remy made quick and easy work of the lock, stepping into the bathroom. 

Kurt looked up at him from the floor of the shower stall, eyes glistening with tears, soapy towel in hand.  "I can not get the dirt off," he whispered, the tears spilling down his cheeks.  

"Oh cher…" he let the sentence trail off as he kneeled next to the now sobbing Kurt and gathered him once more in his arms.  He wanted to take away the emotions that were hurting Kurt but was mindful of the Professor's advice as he could see the sense in it.  So he tried to calm Kurt as much as he could, letting him know that he was here, that he wasn't going anywhere. 

Kurt sobbed into Remy's chest, feeling so ashamed that he was breaking down yet again in front of this man but unable to help himself.  Showing the Professor had seemed to bring everything back to the front of his mind, not that it hadn't been there all along but he had been able to push it away.  So he let Remy hold him, the water from the shower soaking the both of them. 

It wasn't until the water began to grow cold that Remy leaned over and turned the shower off.  He couldn't help the shiver when the cold air from the bathroom hit him. 

"Let's get out of here, 'ey?"  Kurt nodded and they were gone in a cloud of smoke reappearing in Kurt's room.  Remy looked at Kurt's dripping form, wishing he had thought to grab a towel, and brushed back some of the wet hair from Kurt's face.  Once Kurt was looking back at him, he smiled slightly.  "Y' okay now?" 

Kurt looked back down.  "Yeah, I guess, it's just… with the Professor… it brought everything back… Gott, when is this going to end?"  Kurt looked up at Remy with big, pleading eyes.  Remy gathered him in his arms once again. 

"I dunno, cher," he whispered.  "Don't t'ink it ever really ends, mais it will get better."  He stood, hauling Kurt up as well.  "Now, we are all wet, someone needs t' go an' get some towels," Remy hinted, looking pointedly at Kurt.  Kurt rolled his eyes but teleported to the bathroom and back, towels in hand. 

"I'm beginning to think that I'm nothing but your errand boy," Kurt said teasingly.  Remy grinned at him.  Kurt was just pulling a t-shirt on over his head when he heard Remy clear his throat from behind him.  Kurt turned to him. 

"I left my bag by de doors downstairs, was t'inking dat y' could-"  He stopped as Kurt, once again rolling his eyes, disappeared only to reappear a moment later, handing the bag over to Remy.  "T'anks cher." 

"No problem.  I'll be right back though, I gotta get my stuff out of the bathroom."  Remy nodded and as soon a Kurt was gone he quickly stripped and changed into some dry clothes.  Remy figured that seeing a naked man standing in front of him at this point could only make Kurt uncomfortable, even if he pretended that nothing was the matter.  He was surprised that Kurt allowed him as much freedom with touch as he did.  Before he could continue along that track of thought Kurt was back, looking much better with dry fur, combed hair and clear eyes, even if they were a bit puffy from the crying. 

"So did the Professor say where you would be sleeping?" Kurt asked, letting the clothes in his arms fall to the floor in a messy pile. 

Remy had to restrain a groan as his thoughts were brought to this rather unpleasant topic.  He sighed though and answered Kurt.  "Oui, do y' know where Scott's room is?" 

Kurt looked at him in slightly amused shock before breaking into a smile.  "You and Scott?  Just remember that killing is bad." 

Remy sighed and looked disappointed.  "What if he were t' 'accidentally' fall out de window?"  Kurt just gave him a look and Remy rolled his eyes.  "Fine, but I don' t'ink dat we'll be getting' along t' good." 

"You could always stay here," Kurt offered rather nervously.  His doubts were beginning to come back again.  What if Remy didn't want to stay here with him?  Maybe Remy had finally come to his senses and realized just how worthless he was.  But, of course, he was with an empath and Remy sensed his fears. 

"Stop dat," Gambit said, glaring at Kurt but with no voltage to the look.  "I want t' stay here wit' y', cher but de Professor said dat since we are 'romantically involved' dat we can' share a room."  He snorted in disgust.  Just what did the Professor think was going to happen anyway? 

"Oh, well, I'll show you where Scott's room is then…"  Kurt began to lead the way out of the room and though he tried to ignore it couldn't stop the swell of fear that came with knowing that he would be alone tonight.  He pushed it aside though, the mansion was the safest place that he could possibly be, and nothing would be able to hurt him here.  Besides he was a big boy now, surely he could deal with sleeping alone. 

# 

Scott paced his room angrily, waiting for his new roommate to show up.  He couldn't believe that the Professor would do this to him!  He did not want to have to share a room with an Acolyte, even a, supposedly, converted one.  On the other hand, the only other room available was Kurt's and Scott did not trust Gambit one bit where Kurt was concerned.  In Scott's eyes the less he was around Kurt, the better. 

Something had scared Kurt, terrified him even.  Although Scott was sure that the others hadn't noticed, Scott had seen the way that Kurt had flinched, ever so slightly, when someone reached for him.  He had seen the masked fear in those yellow eyes. 

Scott didn't know what had happened but he was sure that it had something to do with Gambit and he was determined to find out.  Talking to Kurt wouldn't work, Gambit had probably threatened him, and so Scott would go right to the source and demand that Gambit tell him what was going on.  At least that would be easier if they shared a room. 

He turned his head when the door opened and Gambit walked into the room, dressed for sleep and obviously just coming from the shower.  He had already moved the few things he had into the room a bit earlier.  Gambit scanned the room for a moment, ignoring Scott, before walking across to the obviously unoccupied bed.  Not halfway there Scott grabbed his arm, effectively stopping him. 

"Gambit, I want-" Scott started, only to be cut off as Gambit smacked his hand away and turned on him. 

"I don' care what y' want Cyclops, I ain't in de mood."  Gambit turned and continued on his way to the bed.  He was tired and angry, wanting nothing more than a fight but knowing that to fight here could get him kicked out. 

"Tell me what happened to Kurt!  What did you do to him?" Scott demanded.  He would not back down on this one.  He wanted to help Kurt but he couldn't do that if he didn't even know what was going on. 

Gambit turned back to him and almost snarled his reply.  "Christ Scott!  I didn' do anyt'ing t' him, I **wouldn't** do anyt'ing t' him so just back off!  If he wanted t' tell y' he would have!"

Scott stared at Gambit has he made to the bed and let himself collapse across it, surprised by the anger tinged with hurt that backed those words.  Maybe the Professor would know something and he resolved to ask about it tomorrow.  Tonight he was tired and maybe sleep would help to clear his mind.                                           # 

Remy tossed uneasily as something seemed to fight for his attention and bring him back to wakefulness.  Blinking up at the dark ceiling for a moment he tried to figure out what had woken him.  He looked across at the alarm clock, discovering that it was only a little after one and, groaning slightly at the hour, let his eyes slip closed again.  He could feel himself drifting off when it hit him again, a wave of fear, pain and anger that caused him to jerk upright with a weak cry and grasp his head in some inane effort to stop it. 

"Kurt…"  He leapt out of the bed and ran towards the door, ignoring a shocked Cyclops who had woken at his cry.  He knew that he should have argued with the Professor about allowing Kurt to be alone, he had known that this could happen but had figured that it wasn't worth making a scene over.  Now though he wished that he had. 

"Hey, wait!  Gambit!"  Cyclops said as he bolted out of the room.  He didn't bother to stop though and was unsurprised when he heard the sound of Cyclops following him.  When he reached Kurt's door Xavier and Jean were also there.  He stopped and looked at them in confusion and Jean answered nearly crying. 

"He's broadcasting," she explained.  She looked up briefly at Scott who had come up behind Remy, then back to the Professor.  "God, Professor did you know-"  Xavier put a hand up to stop her. 

"Yes, Jean and he did not want anyone else knowing so I'd appreciate, as I'm sure Kurt would, you keeping this to yourself."  She nodded, wiping away tears.  "Now, I think that it is time you and Scott were going back to bed." 

"But-" Scott began. 

"Now, Scott," the Professor ordered.  Scott's shoulders dropped but he turned away.  Jean left as well, knowing that she would be getting no sleep tonight.  The Professor turned back to Remy only to find that he had slipped into Kurt's room and was now holding and whispering to the young mutant.  He tapped lightly on Remy's mental shields hoping that Remy would let him in.  Remy turned his head towards the Professor, said something to Kurt that was too low for Xavier to hear and then walked over the door shutting it behind him. 

"What do y' want?" he asked Xavier shortly, obviously wanting to get back to Kurt. 

"Are you planning on spending the night with Kurt?"  Remy rolled his eyes angrily.  "What de hell do y' t'ink we're gonna do?  Jump each ot'er?  He was just raped for God's sakes!  We're not-" 

"That's not what I was going to say," Xavier interrupted.  "I was going to say that perhaps I was wrong earlier."  Remy looked at him in surprise.  "You two can share a room; Kurt trusts you and you will be able to help him better with his nightmares than anyone else could." 

"Merci, Professor," Remy said with a genuine smile, turning to head back into Kurt's room.  Xavier smiled as well, as Remy disappeared into the room. 

A/N: Next chapter will have more of the other x-men and what they think and stuff in it. And more interaction between them and Remy and Kurt. Anyway, there ya go, a nice (sorta) long chapter to make up for the wait (hopefully). 


	7. chapter seven

Chapter Seven

Scott walked slowly back to his room, feet practically dragging in his reluctance to leave.  What could possibly be bothering Kurt so badly that it would have the Professor this concerned and Jean near to tears?  Why wouldn't Kurt let him know?  He only wanted to help.

He reached his room and slid back under the covers, glaring briefly at the empty bed across from him.  How had Gambit known that Kurt was having a nightmare?  Was he a telepath?  He would have to ask the Professor in the morning as he was sure that he would not get an answer from Gambit.  Speaking of Gambit, where was he?  He thought that the Professor would have sent him away as well, but as the minutes dragged by Scott realized that he wasn't coming back, was more than likely staying with Kurt.  That angered him.  He didn't understand how the Professor, or Kurt himself, could be putting so much trust into an acolyte.

Another twenty minutes drug by and still Scott found himself staring up at the ceiling, his mind traveling in endless circles.  There was a light knocking at the door and he blinked at it in surprise.  Perhaps the Professor had come to speak with him.

"Come in," he said quietly, not wanting to disturb the silence that seemed to hang around him.  His door opened silently and Scott was forced to blink in surprise once again as Jean walked into his room.  Hearing her sniff and recognizing it as the start of a sob, he was out of the bed and had Jean in his arms in an instant, trying to comfort her.  He didn't say anything, waited for her to speak instead.

Eventually she pulled away from him slightly and looked up at him.  She seemed to hesitate but after a short moment spoke.  "Can I… stay here for a bit?"

"Of course," he whispered to her.

"Thank you."  He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and guided her to the bed.  They lay down, him still holding her so that her head was resting against his shoulder, wondering what she could have seen in Kurt's dream and let the silence descend over them again.

"Do you know what happened to Kurt?" Scott finally asked.  He felt her nod against his shoulder.  When she did not say anything he spoke again.  "Did Gambit-?"

She jerked away from him, angrily wiping tears from her eyes and glaring at him.  "Remy did not do anything!"  When Scott simply looked at her doubtfully she sighed.  "It's not up to me to tell you what happened; you'll just have to wait for Kurt to come to you.  But I will tell you that Remy didn't do anything, Kurt wouldn't trust him so much if he had."

"But he was on Magneto's team, how can we trust him?"

"You had better find a way because like it or not Kurt does trust him."  She was becoming frustrated again.  "You do not want to loose Kurt as a friend just because you are too narrow minded to accept Remy."

"He hasn't given me any reason to accept him."

"You haven't given him the chance!  You trust Kurt don't you?"

Scott nodded.  "Of course."

"Then trust him in this.  He believes that Remy is not a danger to him or any of us and I agree with him."

Scott snorted.  "We'll see what happens when he betrays us to Magneto."  He knew he had gone to far when he saw Jean's hands clench at her sides and her eyes practically blaze in anger.

"You can be so insensitive sometimes!"  She leapt off the bed and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her with the use of her telekinesis.

Scott sighed and slumped back against the pillows.  This was just great.  Now he and Jean were arguing over Gambit.  He was already causing trouble and Scott knew that there could only be more to come.  Gambit may have had Jean and Kurt, even the Professor, fooled but he had to slip up eventually and when he did Scott would be there.

#

In the mansions kitchen, Xavier too was awake and pondering the dilemma that was now presented to him.  Of all the things that could have happened to one of his students in a world that hated them, he had never once considered rape.  He was not sure how to help Kurt deal with this or if indeed he could help at all.

He took comfort, though, in the fact that Kurt did not have to deal with this on his own, had found someone whom he could open up to, even though it was to one of the most unlikely people.  Xavier shook his head with a small smile.  He had been foolish to think that having those two in separate rooms would work.  Kurt could not be alone and Remy was more than willing to take up the responsibility of being the one to look over him.  Grabbing a glass to fill with water his thoughts turned momentarily to Gambit.

Seeing Remy coming home with Kurt and then, even more surprising, having him ask if he could stay, had, to say the least, shocked Xavier.  He had, of course, said yes, that was what this school was supposed to be about after all.  Helping mutants that needed it and who could need that help more than someone who had been duped into going or had even gone willingly with Magneto.  Remy's views were probably biased due to that and Xavier hoped that he could make Remy see that it was possible for mutants and humans to live together in peace and dispel whatever other nonsense Magneto had planted in the boy's head.

Before he could even begin to think about Remy, though, he had to help Kurt as best he could.  He would suggest tomorrow that Kurt try therapy.  Talking about it would, with any luck, help him to move past this.  Hopefully Kurt would let him in and confide in him.

Finishing off his water, he dropped the empty glass in the sink and headed back to his room.  For now, the questions would have to remain unanswered.  Tomorrow he would speak with Kurt.

#

The morning came far sooner than he would have liked, the sun streaming in through the window.  Kurt burrowed his head deeper against Remy's chest in an effort to block it out.  He did not want to wake up yet and face the day.  Were it up to him, he would much rather prefer to hide from the world and the rest of this house, spending the day cuddled in bed with Remy.

Remy made no move to wake, though he did tighten his arms instinctually around Kurt.  Kurt felt safe in his arms and he hoped that the Professor would let Remy stay in his room permanently and not go back to Scott's.

It had taken him some time to finally fall asleep again last night, too scared of the images to even close his eyes.  Remy had been like a rock, though, holding him and shushing him, telling him it would be okay because no one would ever be able to get near Kurt while he was here.  So he had fallen asleep in Remy's protective embrace and the nightmares had not bothered him anymore that night.

He still did not want to leave that embrace but a loud growl from Remy's stomach told him that Remy would probably appreciate it if he was awakened so that they could eat, as well as reminding Kurt of how hungry he was himself.  He shook Remy by the shoulder gently, trying to wake him.  Remy nearly growled at him and cracked one eye open to peer over at him.

"An' why are y' waking me at dis ungodly hour?"

"Its 10:00," Kurt was amused.  Remy was definitely not a morning person.  He would absolutely hate the morning training sessions when they started, if he ever decided to show up to them.  Kurt wouldn't put it past Remy to skip them altogether.

Remy glared and buried his face into the crook of Kurt's neck.  "Too early…sleep…," he murmured, closing his eyes again.  Kurt could feel Remy's breath tickling out across his fur and was once again tempted to just stay there all day but now his own stomach had begun to make its demand for food.

"Come on, Remy, we need food, I'm going to starve." Both of them had faster metabolisms than normal humans due to their mutant powers and neither of them had eaten all that much yesterday due to the nervousness they felt in coming to the mansion.  Now, though, Kurt was hungry and nothing was going to stop him from getting to the kitchen.  On second thought, maybe he could convince Remy to bring him breakfast in bed.  He knew that he shouldn't though, not because Remy wouldn't do it for him, but because he couldn't hide from everyone in the mansion forever.  So, he shook Remy again.

Remy didn't respond other than to pull Kurt closer to him, trapping Kurt's arms between them so that he couldn't move them.  That didn't bother Kurt though as he brought his tail around and whacked Remy in the head with it.  Remy jerked his head back to glare at him.

"Food," was all Kurt said.

Remy rolled his eyes.  "Fine, we'll go eat."  Remy's stomach growled, agreeing with him.  It took a few moments but they both managed to get untangled from the sheets and dressed in presentable clothes to head downstairs.

Walking into the kitchen Kurt could hear no voices and was momentarily thankful that there was nobody there.  When he walked in, however, he was less than happy to see Logan lounging in one of the chairs, drinking coffee.  Logan looked up briefly at their entrance, glaring at Remy and looking almost concerned at Kurt before turning his attention back to his coffee.

Kurt paused for a moment hesitantly, not sure if he wanted to walk by the man.  Remy seemed not to notice his hesitance though and walked by Wolverine without even a glance.  Opening the fridge, he began rooting around inside it for something edible.

"What did y' want t' eat, cher?"  Remy looked over his shoulder at Kurt who was still standing on the other side of the kitchen.  Wolverine let out a low growl and stood, dropping off his glass in the sink before walking out of the room.

"Good to see you back, elf," he said as he passed Kurt by the door.  Kurt nodded to him with a small smile and Logan walked out.

"Cher?"  Kurt looked over at him.  "Y' okay?"  Remy had stopped looking through the fridge and was now watching him intently.

"Uh, yeah, fine."

Remy looked at him skeptically.  "Uh huh."  He sighed.  "When will y' learn dat y' can' lie t' me, cher?"  Kurt looked down.  "Y' can' hide from dem forever.  Dese are y' friends an' dey won' hurt y'."

"I know but it's still hard and Logan...he isn't exactly an easy person to be comfortable around normally."

Remy smiled at him and walked across the kitchen to wrap him in a hug.  Kurt felt the tension leave him and relaxed against Remy. A throat was cleared behind them and, though Kurt tried to jerk away.  Remy simply looked up still holding Kurt to him.  Jean looked back at them and offered up a small smile.  Kurt blushed at having Jean catch him snuggled up to Remy even though he knew that she would not care.  He shouldn't care either, he knew.  He certainly wasn't ashamed of Remy but he was afraid of what Remy would think of having Jean catch them in an obvious embrace.  It was clear that he didn't care, though, since he gave Kurt a final squeeze before letting go and turning to Jean.

"Are you two hungry?  I was just about to make a late breakfast for myself but I don't mind making something for you as well," she offered.  Kurt smiled at her.

"Thanks Jean."  Kurt sat himself at the table, trying his best to appear confident.  She smiled at him and began moving around the kitchen, preparing to make a simple breakfast for the three of them.  As she was cooking, Remy prepared a new pot of coffee seeing as Logan had drunk the last of the previous batch.

"Have you spoken with Scott yet," she asked Kurt after a short while.  Remy snorted.

"I haven't really had the chance to talk to anyone yet."

"He was really worried about you."  She set the bowls of oatmeal on the table and took a seat next to Kurt.  "I think that it would put his mind at ease if you were to speak with him and show him that you are all right."

"I'll do that."  She smiled and nodded at him.

#

Remy watched the interaction between the two silently.  Kurt was trying to be confident but he was still nervous.  Remy felt his anger growing, unable or unwilling to hold it back like he had been doing since he first found Kurt in that alley.  He needed something or someone to take his anger out on.

Standing he told them both that he would see them later; he had something he needed to do.  He left the kitchen and headed in a random direction.  Maybe a walk would help to clear his mind.  He turned a corner and found himself at the main entrance.  He walked outside into the hot air.  He slowly made his way over to the garage, thinking that he would see what vehicles they had here.

Logan was there, working on his bike and looked up when Remy stepped in.  Remy nodded to him in silent greeting and Logan stood.  Remy watched warily as Logan came over to him.

"Can I help y', homme," Remy asked when Logan was standing in front of him.  Logan studied him for a moment.

"I don't know what happened with you and Kurt but it's obvious that Kurt likes ya."

"So?"  Remy asked, unimpressed with Logan's intimidation tactics.

"So, ya had better not hurt him, Cajun, or I'll be introducing you ta the sharp end of my claws.  Got it?" Logan snarled out. Remy sighed, what was this the third time he had been threatened now? 

"I wouldn' do anyt'ing t' hurt him, Logan.  I swear it, rat'er die first," he said seriously.  Logan watched him for a moment before nodding. 

"Good."  Again he paused to study Remy and Remy got the distinct impression that Logan was sniffing him.  He remembered Logan's powers and realized that Logan must be able to tell what he was feeling from scent.  It made him uneasy that Logan was able to read him so easily.  "You look like ya need ta blow off some steam, Gumbo.  Come with me."  Logan turned and walked away, not bothering to see if Remy would follow him.  After a moments pause, wondering where Logan was taking him, Remy shrugged and followed.

They walked silently back into the mansion and into one of the elevators.  Logan hit the button for one of the lower levels and turned back to Remy. 

"Charles told me that ya planned on staying with the X-Men?"

"Oui." Remy didn't see the need for further explanation and Logan didn't ask for one.

"Then I guess now's as good a time as any to see just how much training ya got at Magneto's."

Remy raised an eyebrow and they stepped out of the elevator as it came to a stop and the doors slid open.  "Y' takin' me t' de Danger Room?"  He had heard about that room, as well as a few other interesting things the X-Men had including Cerebro, from Magneto.  The prospect of going to the Danger Room thrilled him.

"Yep."  Remy couldn't help the grin as he thought of the destruction he could do in there.  "Don't get excited kid; we're not doing any simulations, just a little one on one."

"Wit' y'?"

Logan snorted.  "What's the matter, boy?  Y' scared?"

Remy glared at him.  "Of  y', old man?"  He grinned and Wolverine led the way into the Danger Room.  A pair of practice mats lay in the middle of the room but otherwise it was metal and barren.  Still, Remy looked around him in awe.  He had never seen anything like this before and wished that he could be training in it right now.  "Dis place is magnifique."

Logan practically rolled his eyes.  "Quit yer gawking an' get over here," he growled.  Remy turned to Logan, already on the practice mats looking at him with impatience, and walked over to him.  A few quick stretches and they were facing each other, taking on defensive stances.  "No powers," Logan stated.  Remy agreed easily.

They started off easily enough, both of them trying to get a feel for the other's fighting style.  A few minutes into the fighting and Logan began to attack faster.  Still Remy managed to dodge or counter the blows and, grinning, Logan attacked with even more fury.  Remy grimaced as one strike connected with his shoulder, the adamantium making it feel like a brick had been slammed into him.  He grunted and stumbled back.  Logan pressed his advantage and Remy now fought desperately to ward off the attacks that were thrown at him.  It wasn't long before Logan had him flat on his back, one knee jammed into his throat keeping him down.  Logan grinned and got off him, offering him a hand up which Remy took. 

"Again?"  Logan asked.  Remy didn't answer, just took on another defensive stance and waited for Logan to come at him again.

# 

Bobby looked around at those who were gathered in the room with him.  They were looking back at him slightly stunned.  He enjoyed the attention and the effect that his words had had on everyone. 

"Are you sure?" Amara asked. 

"Yeah, you're probably reading too much into this," Kitty agreed. 

Bobby shook his head enthusiastically.  "No, I'm telling you.  When they came out of the Professor's office Remy looked like he was comforting Kurt and Kurt was leaning back into him, tail wrapped around his leg and everything.  I'm telling you they're together." 

"What's the big deal anyway?  Who cares if they're together?" Roberto finally spoke up. 

Bobby looked at him in horror.  "Have you no idea what great gossip this is?" 

"I doubt that they want us talking about it to other people."  Bobby just glared at him. 

Kitty looked down at the bed she was sitting on, ignoring everyone else and playing with a loose thread on the quilt.  Jubilee leaned over her and smiled. 

"What's the matter Kitty?  Jealous," she teased.  Kitty looked up at her, indignant, and brushed her bangs aside. 

"No," she denied.  She played with the thread some more.  "But, I never knew that he was… interested in guys.  I thought he liked, well, me." 

Jubilee barked out laughter.  "I knew it!  You want all of Kurt's attention to yourself." 

"I do not." 

"Deny it all you want, you know it's the truth."  Bobby and Roberto, sensing that this was going to turn into some female conversation, quickly got up and left the room.  The fact that Amara and Jubilee had started glaring at them helped them to get the hint that they were no longer wanted, never mind that it was Bobby's room they were in.  Once they were gone, Amara and Jubilee sat down in front of Kitty on Bobby's bed.  They stared at her silently and eventually she got frustrated and looked up at them with a huffed out breath. 

"Fine.  Maybe I am jealous… a little." 

"But why?  I thought you liked Lance," Amara said, confused. 

Kitty smiled momentarily but it disappeared.  "I do.  I'm just going to miss having Kurt's attention, I guess." 

"Well as long as you don't do anything stupid like try to break them up," Jubilee commented, trying to be serious. 

Kitty looked at her in surprise.  "I wouldn't!  Kurt is still my friend."  Kitty began to get angry.  "I wouldn't hurt him like that." 

"All right, calm down."  Jubilee tried to dispel the anger that was now radiating from Kitty.  Kitty glared for a moment but the defensive posture she had taken relaxed.  A knocking at the door distracted them all.  Bobby and Sam stuck their heads in, Roberto having left for his own room. 

"What do you want?" 

"This is my room you know.  I want it back."  Bobby crossed his arms and stepped in the room. 

"Fine.  We were done here anyway."  Jubilee got up and walked out of the room, Kitty and Amara following her.  Bobby and Sam walked further into their shared room and flopped down on their separate beds. 

"What were they doing in here anyway?" 

"I was telling them that Kurt and Gambit are together." 

Sam looked shocked, if not slightly disturbed.  "They're gay?" 

Bobby looked over at Sam, who was now sitting up on his bed.  "Uh, yes?  I think so anyway." 

"Oh."  Sam sat silently for a moment and Bobby studied him. 

"You got a problem with that?"  Bobby sat up as well and glared angrily at Sam. 

"Well, I don't know, I mean..." 

"Forget it," Bobby said with a disgusted shake of his head.  He stood and began to walk out of the room.  "You know, I never thought that a mutant of all people could be prejudiced," Bobby spat over his shoulder as he walked out.  Sam watched after him for a moment before dropping his head with a heavy sigh. 

A/N: Apparently I am just no good at fast updating, ey? But think of it this way, which would you prefer, for me to update really fast and probably end up doing a crappy job or for me to take my time and do a good job so that you all can actually enjoy the story? Yeah, that's what I thought. Sigh, it probably wouldn't take so long if I actually knew where I wanted to go with this story… I had some ideas but now I'm not sure what I'm doing. Anyway, next chapter Scott and Kurt talk and more Logan and Remy. Probably a bit of Rogue in there to. 


	8. chapter eight

Silver Foxglove:…o.O…*looks down at floor*…O.O…*pats head*..it'll be okay..dude, don't hurt yourself, look *points below at new chapter* see? Yay! It'll all be okay now, see the nice new chapter?  ^_^ 

Whoo…look, yes, it is a new chapter…and it only took how long? And, yay! Everything is now beta read by Marilyn and Ahra! 

Chapter Eight

Kurt searched the mansion looking, unsuccessfully, for Scott.  After his talk with Jean, he decided that he might as well get the talk over with as soon as possible.  He didn't know what he was so worried about anyway.  Scott had been one of his best friends since he had shown up at the mansion and he knew that Scott would not even think about hurting him.  Besides, it was not fair to make Scott worry when there was no reason for it and what type of friend would he make if he went on avoiding Scott like he had been doing?  So he searched for him, beginning to wonder if Scott was even in the mansion.

He was feeling jumpy, though.  The comforting presence of the link that he shared with Remy seemed to be dulled slightly.  He wondered if that was Remy's doing, if he was blocking it off for some reason.  With that thought came the fear that Remy had changed his mind about everything.  He pushed it aside though as being foolish.  He had to stop thinking like that and acting like a child.  He would just have to trust Remy not to leave.

The sound of angry loud music reached his ears and seemed to come closer.  He recognized the sound of an engine under it and walked over to a nearby window to see who it was.  The fire red convertible, complete with stripes, came up the driveway and disappeared from his view as it rolled into to the garage.  Scott was home and Kurt wasn't sure how to feel about that.

He walked slowly towards the main staircase, knowing that Scott would most likely have to walk by it shortly.  He walked slowly, though, in the hopes that he could stall the inevitable just a little longer.

He hadn't talked to anyone without Remy there to watch or step in if anything went wrong.  Even with Jean, he had left only a few moments after Remy had.  He just hadn't the courage to talk with everyone.  Now he didn't even have the empathic link - which for some reason Remy seemed to be blocking - to help him through this.  He was going to talk with Scott though and, still, he didn't know what he would say.  Scott would want to know what was wrong and Kurt knew that he couldn't tell Scott the truth but he didn't want to lie to him either.

He reached the bottom of the stairs and took a seat on them, resting his elbows on his knees and placing his chin in his hands as he waited for Scott.  It didn't take long, only a few minutes later and Scott, spotting Kurt as soon as he stepped into the room, walked over to him.  Kurt smiled up at him.

"Can we talk?"

Kurt nodded.  "Ja, of course."

Scott took a seat next to him on the stairs but neither of them spoke a word, both unsure how to start or what they even really wanted to say.  Finally, Scott broke the silence.

"I know that you don't want to tell me what happened and… I guess I can respect that, even if I do think that you should talk about it.  It's just. if you ever change your mind, I'll be here for you.  We all will be."

Kurt smiled softly.  "Thanks, Scott, that really means a lot to me.  This isn't exactly something that I can talk about though," he said with a nervous laugh, running a hand through his hair.

Scott's expression turned slightly bitter.  "You seem to be able to talk about it with Gambit just fine."

Kurt glared for a moment, before letting out a sigh.  "I wouldn't have spoken with him either if he hadn't been the one to find me, if that helps."

"Why do you trust him so much?  He's an Acolyte, who knows what he could be up to running loose in the mansion."

Kurt shook his head.  "He's not up to anything, Scott.  He's not going to do anything to hurt or betray us.  I trust him."

"Why?"

Kurt thought for a moment about what he could say.  "Because he understands."

"More than your friends?"  Kurt shrugged.  "We could understand just as well if you would simply talk to us."

"You couldn't understand this."

"How do you know if you don't give us a chance?"

"There are some things that you can't talk about with friends."

"But you can with an enemy?"

Kurt stood and turned to glare down at Scott.  "Gott, Scott, I know that you want to help but you can't with this so just drop it!  If I ever want to talk with you, I will, but right now I just can't handle this and you grilling me isn't helping!"  Scott opened his mouth to try and say something but Kurt stopped him.  "Nein, you listen.  You want to help, then stop asking questions and be a friend.  Remy is not going to do anything wrong here, Scott.  I trust him and, if you were really a friend, you would at least make an effort to do the same."

"I don't understand why you trust him so much."

"You don't need to understand, just accept it."

"Accept the fact that you brought an Acolyte into this house?!"  Now Scott stood, angry that Kurt obviously didn't trust him enough to tell him what was going on.  Kurt was becoming angry as well, though fear was still riding close behind it.

"He's not an Acolyte anymore, Scott; he's an X-Man now."

Scott took a step towards Kurt, about to retort, but faltered when Kurt took a step away from him, nearly flinching.  "Kurt?"  Kurt looked at him in surprise and Scott's face, which had - for little less than a second - taken on the appearance of someone else, morphed back to normal.  Scott was looking at him with concern and even some fear and Kurt cringed back, taking another step away.

"Kurt?"  Scott repeated cautiously and reached one hand toward him.

"No."  Kurt took another step back.  Why couldn't these flashbacks and nightmares stop tormenting him?  Remy had said that it would get better but right now he couldn't believe that, not when the hand reaching towards him in concern was sending waves of near panic through him.  It wasn't helping that the usual comfort of the empathic link was nearly non-existent; the only feeling he was getting from Remy was the occasional flash of mild pain.  His mind turned that pain into something much more.  "Just stay away from me!"  He didn't wait for any reply and teleported away, leaving a thoroughly confused Scott standing at the bottom of the stairs.

#

Remy froze suddenly, allowing Wolverine to get a drop on him and use a simple shoulder throw to toss Remy over his back and onto the danger room floor.  When Remy didn't immediately flip back to his feet like he had before, Logan began to get worried that he had actually hurt the kid.

"Ya alright, Cajun?"

Remy seemed to stare at nothing for a moment and Logan was about to reach for his com. badge to call Beast when Remy finally got to his feet, though he still looked preoccupied.

"I gotta go."  He ran for the door but was forced to stop when it wouldn't open for him.  He punched the door in frustration, and looked back at Logan, who was walking up behind him.

"Where's the fire, kid?"

"Merde, Logan, I gotta get upstairs, mais I can' tell y' why."

Logan studied him for a short moment while Remy fretted.  He nodded and punched in the code for the door, following as Remy nearly ran to the elevator where he was once again forced to wait for Logan to put in the code.

Once they were finally back upstairs, Remy didn't even bother saying another word to Logan, just started running for Kurt's room.  He had had the link narrowed down so that only traces of emotions could get through as he hadn't wanted Kurt to feel his pain when one of Logan's attacks made it past his block.  However, he had still been able to feel Kurt's panic when it started.  Now he had the link fully open, assuring Kurt that he was coming, and ran down the hall to Kurt's room.

Scott was standing in front of Kurt's door, looking confused and shocked, guilt radiating off of him.  Remy ran up to him, grabbed him by his shirt lapels and slammed him hard into the wall.  "Connard!  What de hell did y' do t' him?!"

Scott stared at him in guilty shock for a moment before it turned to anger and he shoved Remy off him.  "Back off, Gambit."

Remy took a step back towards him but the feelings coming off of Kurt made him turn away from Scott and head for Kurt's door instead.  He turned back to Scott before walking into the room.  "I'll deal wit' y' later, homme, an' y' had better pray dat Kurt doesn' say dat y' are de one dat upset him."

It took Remy a moment before he spotted Kurt, curled into a ball in one of the corners of the room.  He smiled sadly and made his way across the room to kneel before Kurt and wait for him to acknowledge his presence.  It took a moment before Kurt finally looked up at him and, once again, Remy smiled softly.

"Hey, cher," he said quietly.  Kurt looked back at him with watering eyes and Remy scooted forward to hold him.  "Cher, what happened?  Did Scott-?"

Kurt shook his head against Remy's shoulder.  "He didn't do anything."  He looked up at Remy with big pleading eyes.  "Gott, why doesn't this just end?  I keep getting flashbacks and the nightmares and I couldn't feel you and Scott was asking questions."  Remy gathered Kurt closer to him and began a rocking motion.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't even t'ink," he began murmuring into Kurt's hair.  "Should have known better, me, mais I didn' want y' t' feel any anger or pain from me. Am so angry about what happened t' y'."

Kurt looked up at him, suddenly remembering the flashes of pain that he had been getting from Remy earlier.  "What were you doing?"

Remy smiled at the worry he could feel.  "Was angry, so Logan took me down t' de Danger Room."  He rolled his shoulders and cringed slightly.  "I t'ink he won."  He paused.  "I'm sorry I closed off de link, I jus' didn' want y' getting' concerned over not'in.  Y' gonna be okay now?"

Kurt nodded.  "Ja, just… could we maybe stay here for a bit?  Alone?"

"'Course we can."  He stood, bringing Kurt with him and lead him over to Kurt's bed.  "Don' like sharin' y' anyway."  Kurt smiled, mood lightening somewhat, and cuddled down on the bed with Remy.

#

Scott stood for a moment and stared at the door before leaving.  He found his footsteps taking him towards the Professor's office and decided that now was as good a time as any to talk to him about Kurt. Surely the Professor had to know what was going on; maybe he could get some information.  He made it to the Professor's office and rapped lightly on the door.

"Yes, Scott?"

Scott entered the office easily, coming to stand in front of the Professor's desk.  "Can I talk to you about something?"  Xavier looked at him displeased and Scott straightened unconsciously under the gaze.

Xavier sighed, seeing that Scott was not going to drop this matter.  "You wish to speak about Kurt yes?"

Scott nodded although he knew that Xavier already knew the answer.  "I just don't understand what's going on here."

"You do not have to understand Scott."

"I just want to help!"  Scott was beginning to get frustrated.  He was supposed to be team leader and therefore it was his job to make sure that all of his teammates were fine, and that included protecting them from any potential threats like Gambit.  Besides that, Kurt was a friend.

"You aren't doing that by pushing Kurt unnecessarily."

"I'm not-"  Xavier held up a hand to stall him.

"I could feel the disturbance that you caused in him."  Scott's shoulders dropped slightly.  "I know that you want to be there for him and I'm glad for it.  Trying to force him to listen to you though, or to answer questions which he made quiet clear he didn't want to answer will only make him resent you."

"Then, what do I do?"

"Be a silent support for him.  Talk to him about other things and just let him know that you're there for him.  There's nothing else that you can do.  You can't control this, Scott."

Scott blinked at him surprised.  "I'm not trying to."  It was a weak protest though; he knew that Xavier was right.  Control was something that he had always strived for in his life and something like this, that he had no hope of controlling, frustrated him.  The Professor was right, though, he wasn't helping anything, was just making it worse.  However, he wasn't ready to let it go completely.  "What about Gambit?"

The Professor frowned.  "I see no problem with Remy."

"We can't just let an acolyte walk right into the middle of us."

"You are trying my patience Scott.  There is nothing wrong with Remy; he is here because of Kurt and I for one, welcome him.  I believe that he has nothing but good intentions.  This institute was made for mutants that needed us.  Who are we turn one of them away?"

"I don't like him, or trust him."

"Personal likes or dislikes have nothing to do with this.  Remy asked to join and I allowed it, much the same as with Lance.  You handled that situation badly and I expect you to handle this better."  It was not a request but an order and Scott could do nothing more than nod his head sullenly.

"Of course, Professor."

Xavier sighed.  "Scott, please just think about this rationally for a while.  You wouldn't want to lose Kurt because you refused to trust him."

"I know."  It was Scott's turn to sigh as he looked down at the floor.  This conversation hadn't gone at all as planned; he still didn't know any more about what was going on but he did have a lot to think about.  He excused himself from the office and headed to the look out.

#

Xavier sighed as Scott left his office and rubbed his temples.  He didn't blame Scott for worrying, any good team leader would.  But, Scott also had to understand that he couldn't fix everything, that not everything that happened to the X-Men immediately became his responsibility.  He shook his head.  He didn't have the time for this right now; he still hadn't spoken with Kurt yet today and planned to remedy this now.

Calling Kurt down to his office and getting a hesitant reply that Kurt was on his way, he sat back and waited.  It was a good fifteen minutes later before Kurt showed up, stepping uncertainly into his office.  He had specifically asked Kurt to come without Remy, curious as to how Kurt would deal with talking to someone alone and the look that Kurt bore nearly broke his heart.  To see someone who had been so happy and full of life reduced to this.  He had to stop himself from shaking his head.

Instead, he smiled at Kurt and beckoned him to come and have a seat.  Kurt did so and instantly began fidgeting, never once looking right at the Professor.

"You don't need to be afraid here, Kurt."

Kurt nodded and finally looked at him.  "I'm sorry."

"It is nothing to be sorry for."  There was a short pause and Xavier could see Kurt trying to relax.  "Have you talked with many of the other students yet?  I know that they were all very worried about you."  He had to reassure Kurt that he was still wanted here and that his friends were not going to desert him.

Kurt shook his head softly.  "Nein, only Scott really, and Jean for a few minutes."

Xavier debated for a moment whether or not he should tell Kurt that Jean knew what had happened but an unintentionally broadcasted thought from Kurt caught his attention.  "Why won't you speak with Scott again?"

Kurt sank back in his chair.  "Because… he scares me," spoken hesitantly but at least Kurt had told him, it was a start.

"Why does he scare you?"  Kurt shrugged and looked back down at the floor, beginning to fidget again.  The Professor knew better than to push.  "I hope that you'll join us for dinner tonight, I know that the others would love to see you again."

Kurt looked up, surprised, and nodded.  "Ja.  I'll be there."

Xavier smiled, pleased.  Kurt could have much more easily said no and hidden from everyone.  It was good to see that Kurt wasn't running from everything even if he was still afraid.  Xavier wondered how much this could be attributed to Kurt having someone who would stand by him through it all.

"Well I'm sure you have other things that you would much rather be doing than sitting in here and talking."  Again Kurt nodded, standing and quickly taking his leave.  Xavier watched him go sadly.

#

_Magneto,_

_Remember when you found me?  You took me out of some alley and gave me a home, a place, and a reason for living.  I remember everything you did for me and I've tried ever since then to make it up to you.  I can't do that anymore.  I care about you, I really do.  But lately, I find myself questioning your motives as well as your means.  I am no longer sure that I agree with what you are doing.  I won't go into any great details, just know that, while I do still have a place for you in my heart, I won't be coming back._

_Just like I needed you, I have found someone who needs me.  I'd tell you who it is but I know that you would only be angrier than you probably already are._

_I'm going to stay with him.  Don't think, though, that he is the only reason I am leaving.  I could never have followed your dream Magnus, he just gave me the motivation I needed to finally leave._

_Don't try to find me, Magnus.  I'm sorry that things had to end this way._

_Remy LeBeau_

Magneto read the note again in shocked anger.  For the past week, he and his other acolytes had been off on a recruiting mission.  Not only had he not managed to bring the mutant that he had wanted back with him but to come home and find that one of his best operatives had left... He crumpled the letter and slammed it down on one of the tables.

If that boy thought that he could just pack up and leave without a fight, he was in for a very rough awakening.

Erik had taken LeBeau off the streets when he had been at his absolute weakest.  It had been a stroke of luck to find such a powerful mutant that was in such a state to be easily manipulated and folded into exactly what Magneto wanted.  So, Magneto took him in.  Helped him through all the pain and grief, slowly turning him into a mutant soldier.  Remy obeyed his every word and all out of some sense of loyalty, looking up to Magneto almost like a father.  Magneto had never seen him as a son though, attachments were pointless.  LeBeau was nothing more than a naïve mutant that would do exactly as he said.

Then, as children have a tendency to do, Remy began to rebel against him.  Mostly just questioning Erik on his orders, or if what he was doing was really what they should be doing.  Magneto, of course, hadn't listened to anything that Remy had to say, simply told Remy to do as he said.  If he went too far, then Magneto would remind him of everything that had been done for him.  That would be enough to quiet the boy and he would do whatever Magneto had ordered him to without further question.

That was the way it had been for the last year.  He had never thought that Remy would actually get the courage to leave him.  He would get Gambit back though.  Track him down and bring him back, whether willingly or by force it didn't matter.  Betrayal was not something that Magneto would take lightly.


End file.
